Crimson & Clover {OC x GUTS} Berserk

17. Enter, Holy Iron Chain Knights

"I think you should still return to her. You owe her that at the very least."

Guts only looked at Marcella. He knew she was right. Still, he hated hearing her talk about Casca. But it was decided, Guts and Marcella would make their way back to Casca, Godo, Rickert, and Erica. It was a visit long overdue.

"What do you intend on doin' once we get back to the others?" Guts asked, he braced himself for her answer, sure she would announce her leave.

"I'm not sure," she spoke softly, "I'd like to rewrite my mistress's grimoire. There are some things I don't want to forget. What about you?"

"My fight isn't over. Not until I erase every apostle and every God Hand from this earth."

She looked down. Of course he would go on, perhaps leave her behind and push her out of his mind like he tried to do with Casca.

Guts noticed her sadness; yet, he was unsure of what he could do to reassure her. He began to speak before closing his mouth once more.

"Guts?" She waited till he met her eyes, "I want to continue helping you."

"You don't have to."

"But I do. I need to avenge Lady Paloma. I couldn't bear to rewrite her work until..." she trailed off, overwhelmed at the task she was committing herself to.

"I see," he focused on the path ahead, his jaw tightened and released.

"Plus, I can't let this bow sit and collect dust now, can I?"

"Marcy?"

"Hm?" she hummed as she examined one of her arrows.

"You should know about me and Casca."

"I don't need to," she put the arrow back in its quiver and readjusted her pack, "I know you love her. You went through so much together. Aside from our time together... I'm not sure I'm cut out for much more."

Guts only stared at her. Yes, he loved Casca. He hated how she had been made to suffer and if he could, he would gladly take all of her pain a hundred times over. Yet, deep within, he started to feel that same way about Marcella. He had nothing to offer a wife, much less to a princess. Still, he felt anxious at the thought of travelling with both Marcella and Casca.

"Is that why ya wanted to run away?"

"What do you mean?"

"You were betrothed," Guts emphasized the word, "Weren't ya?"

"Oh, that," she smiled softly, thinking of the Bakiraka and their training, "You know that part wasn't so bad. That was my duty. What I had been raised and prepared for. It was constant that never changed."

"Then why?"

"I," she paused considering her words, the words that would describe perfectly why she faked her death and ran away, "I hated existing as a nothing more than a ghost. Everyone was against me, even Charlotte. I just never fit in after her mother died. And then there was my uncle. The marriage kept getting pushed further and further into the future."

Guts raised his eyebrow, "So, ya actually wanted to get married?"

"No, Guts, I wanted to get away."

He only nodded. A Kushan prince was definitely an effective way to get away.

"What about you? What was your family like?"

"Confusing."

She only nodded, not wanting to push the subject more after observing the way he tensed up.