Wilderness

Wilderness 2: Rebuke

PROVERBS 27: 5

An open rebuke is better than hidden love!

              God introduces Himself to me in an unexpected way. For someone who hates getting criticized all the time, the last thing I expected was to be rebuked by God. I don't know; no one told me that I should open my Bible to the book of John first before any other books from the Bible. I mean, it was my first time! My spiritual mother didn't inform me or my friend, who is a christian, that reading His Bible is best started with the book of John, but surprisingly, that drew me closer to Him.

I remember being so excited about journaling His Word, or devotion, aswe call it at our church, Rockpoint. I even have that first devotional notebookfrom way back in February 2020. I woke up early in the morning to catch thesunrise and to have a quiet place to meditate on His Word, and I came acrossthe book of Ezekiel 15:8. It wasn't an accident that I read it; I did not feelpeace or the joy that my church mate was talking about; instead, I felt athrobbing pain in my heart. 

EZEKIEL 15:8

"I will make the land desolate because they have been unfaithful, declares the Sovereign Lord."

         It was like God was telling me to repent of my sins and leave them behind. At that very moment, I knew what He was telling me to do. He wants me to choose him, to commit to him, and to be faithful to him. I didn't know back then what He was talking about, but the only thing I know is that He was like a father who wants to discipline His children, a father who is willing to redeem me and to love me despite all my imperfections. 

That moment, I pray that I will be blind to the things that are not helpful to becoming His daughter, and I pray that He will forgive me and reach out for my hand. Little did I know that He had already done it more than 2,000 years ago, and He was just making Himself known to me. That was my first encounter to Him.

         I wasn't sure what to say because normally I would be offended, but He is Greater, and in the midst of my confusion, I saw clarity. I guess that is His power—to create good things out of bad things. I began to trust Him. I began to slowly open my heart to him. And in that simple way of meditating on His Word, that's when He introduces that kind of love that is possible.

From that moment on, I know to myself that a big journey was knocking into my life and I took it.

This book is not all about me surpassing all the challenges and obstacles I encountered in my life; it is all about Him and His works in my life. I would not be able to write this if it weren't for Him. I wanted to share all of the revelations and how possible they were to Him—even the things that were impossible to us.