Why can't you love me? ✔️

Chapter - 31.

Continuation

Ishika POV

I came back to my house at night and thank God dad went to sleep only mom was waiting for me and had an excuse to dad that I am out with Sarthak. And it's not lie.

She looked at me worriedly and I couldn't control myself more and break down in her lap.

"What happened Ishika?" Mom asked me worriedly and took me to my room otherwise my father will listen my cries.

"I deserve this maa....I deserve this. I want last chance to mend everything but now he hates me" I cried and my mother cupped my face.

"Ishika if he loves you then he can't hate you but he is hurt and insecure. You hurt him a lot Ishika. Why will he trust you again? So that you will hurt him again?" I shook my head, mom understood that I am talking about Sarthak and me.

"Ishika listens, you have to gain his trust anyhow otherwise where you will live? Tell me do you told him about Aryan? Or is he mad at you for something else??" she asked and I shook my head

"I met Aryan and I don't know how but I guess he saw me with him" I said slowly and she gasped and hold her head.

"Will you still not over him? He is happy with his own family and here you are trying to destroy your relationship with your husband. Are you crazy Ishika??" I looked at my mom shockingly

"You know Aryan is alive?" And she looked everywhere but me and nodded nervously.

How she can do this to me?

"Why you didn't told me maa?? If I closed the chapter of him earlier then today I would also happy" I said and she started crying.

"I thought this will hurt her. And you will move on with Sarthak. I know he is a very nice person" Like this She further ranted more praises for him. And he truly deserved it.

I am not angry with her anymore. She only wanted to see me happy but here I destroyed everything on my own.

"Agar aap mujhe pahle bata deti toh shayad Jo aaj samjh aa rha hai wo kuch din pahle hi aa jaata" I said regretting everything that I did with Sarthak.

(If you would have told me earlier then perhaps what I am understanding today would have come to me a few days ago)

"Ishika"

"I am fine. Please leave me alone maa" I said and she left.

I sat down on the floor pulling my knees to my chest.

It has been more than 6 months since I and Sarthak got married. But as a wife, I couldn't fulfill my duty though he is so generous that he never demanded anything.

I was obliged to do this wedding because of my orthodox family moreover my strict father. I am very much scared of him. My mother always taught me to better if I don't angry him.

But it does not justify my behaviour towards Sarthak. Really what is his mistake in this? That I never give him a chance. It was only him who was in this relationship. I was so stupid that before I didn't move on from my past and think that he will come and take me with himself, hell I am such a pathetic person.

I was already very much depressed in my own world. Even I couldn't get some time for myself to accept the fact Aryan will never come. But my belief won and he is alive and happy with his new responsibility. And see here I couldn't accept this marriage easily.

Sarthak did everything to make me comfortable with him but I was blind. I hurt him so much. I was always selfish and trying to find my own happiness but the biggest mistake of my life is I tried to find happiness without him. He asked me so many times what problem I have? But I choose to be silent.

Before I am already scared to love someone again as Aryan leaves me after all those promises and secondly I couldn't digest the fact he died. So how do I let another person enter my space. So I started lieing to his family, to my family and myself too. I was so selfish on my own that I forgot I am doing absolutely wrong with him. He really deserves someone better than me. He is so perfect and as a wife I am not worthy for him. I hurt him so much but he didn't give up on his love.

When he decided to divorce me then I am realising that Aryan is my past and if I leave Sarthak after hurting him to this extent then I can also be never happy.

I wiped my tears and.....

To be continued

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