Stay alive while I'm gone(rick x male reader)

10. parents

We just sat there and ate. The mask was laying beside me. "Dad. What is that?" Carl asked me. I looked up at him and smile as I realised he was pointing at my mask. "It's just my mask." I answered. "Why do you have it?" He asked and I just shrugged. "I like it" I said and he nodded. "Can I try it on?" He asked with a smile. "No" I said short. "Oh. Okey" he said and went back to eating.

I was sitting on the rv again as daryl and rick got up. "Go with rick and sleep a bit" daryl said but I didn't move. "Nathan. Come on" Rick said and I still didn't respond. "Nathan?" Daryl asked. "I don't feel so good." I say and daryl grabbed my arm and began to pull me off the rv. Once we got off rick took me over and he pulled me towards a tent that was set up a bit away from the rest. "Okey babe. Listen. You need to speak to me. What's wrong?" Rick asked but I stayed silent. "Nathan." He said and I looked at him. "You don't even know me. Why do you care?" I asked him and his expression changed. "I'm going to hershel now. You need to stay in that tent." He said and I did just that. I waited as he was gone.

He finally came back with hershel. "Rick. I'm not a psychiatric. But I will see what I can do" hershel said to rick as they walked into the tent.

Hershel checked if I was okey and after testing if I could use my brain correctly he left. It was now only me and rick. "Okey. Nathan, I really need you to speak to me if something is wrong" He said and I nodded. "It's carl" I say and see a confused look on Rick's face. "He still calls me dad. I thought that he would stop after a few days but he didn't" I say and look at rick. "You want me to tell him to stop?" He asked. "No. It's that I kinda like it but at the same time I hate it" I said and rick just hugged me. After a moment of silence I pulled away. I pulled my right sleeve up to show my arm without the bracelets that I lost during everything. I turned it around so the inside was showing. "You asked me once why I was wearing the bracelets. They covered the scars" I say as I point to the scars on my forearm. "Nathan. I don't know what to say. I'm so sorry you had to go through it" He said and I shrugged. "I stopped cutting myself when for the first time I put on the mask and went into the street killing people. Everyone called me ronin. Mostly because if you wanted someone killed you just made the word go around that he was a bad guy. A rapist or killer whatever it was. If I heard from it I would kill the person." I said and rick nodded. "It was wrong I know. But it worked for me and people I cared for. I only stopped because of the one guy I couldn't kill. He was Daryl's father. The problem with him wasn't he himself, it was merle and daryl who protected him with their lives. They didn't know what I did so they couldn't know they almost killed me" I said shrugging. "I finally told daryl and he apologised." I said as I saw the worry on Rick's face. "Not that I mind, but why are you telling me this now?" He asked. "So that you can know me" I say and get up.

I walked to the rest of the group who where sitting at the fire and laughing. I walked up and just sat down. "Hey Nathan. How are you?" Glenn asked me as he noticed me sitting. "Bad" I said with my head down. "What's wrong" He asked worried. "I don't have a guitar" I say and look up with a smirk. Glenn just chuckled as Maggie who sat beside me hit me. I laughed and looked at carl who was also laughing and seemed happy with me being happy. I smiled at him as he got up and run to a car.

We sat there waiting for him. He came back with the black guitar from the farm. I look at Hershel questioning if it was okey. He just nodded and I smiled. Carl ran up and gave it to me. He sat as close as possible to me and waited. "Any requests?" I ask and Maggie nodded. "Somewhere only we know" she said and I nodded.

"I walked across an empty land
I knew the pathway like the back of my hand
I felt the earth beneath my feet
Sat by the river and it made me complete
Oh, simple thing, where have you gone?
I'm getting old, and I need something to rely on
So, tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired, and I need somewhere to begin
I came across a fallen tree
I felt the branches of it looking at me
Is this the place we used to love?
Is this the place that I've been dreaming of?
Oh, simple thing, where have you gone?
I'm getting old, and I need something to rely on
So, tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired, and I need somewhere to begin
And if you have a minute, why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So, why don't we go somewhere only we know?
Somewhere only we know
Oh, simple thing, where have you gone?
I'm getting old, and I need something to rely on
So, tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired, and I need somewhere to begin
And if you have a minute, why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So, why don't we go?
So, why don't we go?
Ooh, oh-oh
Ah, oh
This could be the end of everything
So, why don't we go somewhere only we know?
Somewhere only we know
Somewhere only we know"

I ended and someone hugged me from behind. "You're amazing" Rick whispered into my ear. I chuckled and laid the guitar down. "Carl. Time to sleep" Carol said and carl got up and went with her. Rick sat beside where carl once sat. I leaned against him a bit and he put his arm around me. We all sat there like that for a while. We just talked and shared some stories. Glenn was telling us about his parents. "Nathan, what where your parents like?" Glenn asked as I didn't say a thing about myself. "They where okey" I say shrugging. It was a complete lie but I hoped that they didn't notice. "Oh come on. Tell us about them." Maggie pushed. "Okey. Ehm. My mom was a sweet woman. She never would hurt a fly. And my father was a stereotypical American guy" I said. Just as I finished daryl came to sit with us. "What ya talking about?" He asked and I lowered my gaze. Maggie smiled and answered. "Nathan was telling us about his parents" she said and daryl looked at me a bit worried and confused. "You okey?" He asked me and I just nodded. "Ofcourse he is. Why wouldn't he?" Glenn asked. "Well, his parents where shit. So I was just asking if he was okey thinking about it" He said carelessly. I just made myself smaller and pulled away from rick. They all looked confused and daryl looked at me sorry as he realised what he has done. "Nathan I-" daryl tried to say but I just got up.

I walked to my tent and just layed down. I sighed and closed my eyes. Just before I fell asleep Maggie walked inside. "Okey Nathan now listen. I don't care if you're gonna kill me or something but I need to know. What is the deal with your parents? Daryl doesn't want to speak to us at all." She said and I just sat up. "It doesn't matter" I say. "Yes it does" she pushed through. "Okey. Well my dad was an alcoholic and my mother a drug addict. I'm not saying more" I said and got up. "And now leave" I said threatening. She looked up at me not moving. "I'm serious" I said and got a bit closer. She just swallowed and said. "I'm not leaving. We need to talk about it" I tried to hold myself in as much as I could. "Leave me alone. I don't wanna talk. So fucking leave" I said through a clenched jaw. She still didn't move. "No" she said demanding. I snapped and pushed her out my tent and onto the ground. She got up rather quickly. I walked outside and she hit me. "Don't you dare to touch me" she said. I just looked at her emotionless. She hit me again and I punched her in the stomach so hard that she fell over. She was slowly getting up but I kicked her to the ground. Just as I wanted to kick her again I heard yelling. I looked up and saw rick, daryl and Glenn running my way shouting things like "back off Nathan." "Stop it" and "leave her alone" I just looked at the three and before I knew it I was hit in my head with a rock by Maggie. I stumbled back and fell down. I saw Maggie coming up to me with the same rock but was stopped by Glenn. I just sat up and didn't move. Rick got to me first but daryl stopped him from coming too close. "Wait just one second" He said to rick. "Nathan. You're bleeding" daryl told me calmly. I touched my head gently and looked at my hand. It was covered in blood. I sighed. Daryl let rick go and rick hugged me. "I'm sorry" I barely whispered. "It's okey. It's okey" He said calming me.

He helped me to get to hershel. Who was checking on Maggie. We got closer and rick sat me down infront of Maggie. "I'm sorry" I whispered. Maggie looked at me and smiled. "I know. It's okey" she said and I nodded. Hershel walked up to me and began to take care of my wound. "And I thought you said you wouldn't hurt us" He said a bit disappointed. I just looked down and stayed silent. "What happened anyways?" He asked both me and Maggie. "I asked too much questions and he snapped. Daryl said to leave him but I didn't listen" she said and I just stayed silent once again. "Okey. You should be good to go. And if it happens again I won't be so nice" Hershel told me threatening. Before I even could react daryl came in between us. "Don't fucking threaten him, or you will pay for it" He said. I just grab his arm and pulled him away. "Stop" I barely whispered. He turned to me and saw that I was just sad and not even mad. He nodded and I stood up. "Rick?" I asked quietly daryl. "Oh he just went to his tent" He said to calm me. I nodded and went that way.

I walked into the tent and saw rick changing his shirt. He just pulled off his shirt. He turned around and smiled at me. I walked up closer and just sat beside him as he was kneeling. I laid my head on his chest and closed my eyes. "You wanna go to sleep?" He asked me and I just nodded my head without saying anything. He gently helped me down on the bed and walked to the exit. "Where are you going?" I asked half asleep. "Just need to do some stuff. I will be back in a few seconds" He said and I just got up. "I'm going with you" I said and walked with him.

He went to talk with Glenn and daryl about supply runs. I don't know exactly as I just sat beside rick almost asleep on his shoulder. When he was finally done he got up causing me to fall down. "Sorry" He said. "Asshole" I said under my breath. I got up and grabbed his hand and pulled him to our tent. I pushed him inside and onto the bed. Once he laid stable I laid on him and fell asleep in no time.

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So I think it is going good so far and I hope you guys think the same