Ch. 8

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I drove around aimlessly that night. I sped down back roads and avoided the city, I found myself lost in the mountains for a while before I found my way back down and towards the dorms. I ended up all over the outskirts of town, tears pouring down my face as i screamed in anger, in pain. My cheeks started to burn from the tears, that was the only thing that made me stop.

I thought about driving home to my parents house. I thought about hiding away in my childhood room and giving up on college. The only issue is that town has far more memories of him and I than our little college town did... mostly because we never went and did anything.

I had disappeared for over a week, i didn't go to class, i hid away in my dorm room by myself, huddled in a ball in my bed, refusing to show myself to the sunlight, to the public.

"Do you wanna go get some food?" Chelsea, the angel she was, rubbed my back and spoke to me so gently. I shook my head and ate out of my bag of Doritos while watching finding Nemo, a comfort of mine.

"You sure? You can't live off of Doritos and chicken nuggets..." She spoke gently but I could hear the judgement in her tone.

I groaned and dug my hand out of the blanket, giving her the finger. I heard her chuckle softly as her weight shifted my bed slightly.

"Girl come on, don't you think this is a bit... i don't know... dramatic?" She mused, her hand gently on my hip as she leaned to try and look at me.

Excuse me?

"I-i mean that in a loving way..." she mumbled and pulled her hand away, I assumed she felt me tense up and move to glare at her.

I let out a heavy sigh and shifted my weight, sitting up a bit. My hoodie was over my head and the strings were tied in a knot, hiding as much of my face as i could. I cleared my throat a bit and stared at her.

"He is my first real boyfriend Chels..." i grumbled and crossed my arms.

She sat up straighter and pulled her hair over her shoulder, looking away from me.

"Yeah but.. like... you're just on a break... you didn't break up, right?" She mumbled with a shrug, starting to pick at her hang nails.

I groaned, "We might as well had!" I huffed and threw my head back to meet the wall with a bit of a thud, it sounded worse than it felt.

"Do you wanna talk about it....?" She spoke softly, I opened my eyes and looked down at her, she had a sheepish look on her face like she didn't want to set me off. She was sweet in her own way.

I sighed heavily again, bringing my face down to my hands and rubbing my face, hard. "He just said he was sorry... and that maybe we needed a break... but Chels, we haven't hung out in weeks- maybe months!" I groaned and pulled my knees to my chest. I rested my cheek on one of them and rubbed at my nose. Tears threatened my eyes again.

She pursed her lips and sighed, looking down at her hands as she fiddled with her pants.

"I'm sorry babe... I wish I could help...." she mumbled.

I shrugged and shoved my face into my knees, sniffing and trying not to cry. My eyes were already red and puffy and my cheeks hurt.

We were silent for a while. I sniffed and tried to not let the tears flow again.

"You know what I think you need?" She started gently, leaning towards me.

I grumbled at her from behind my knees "I swear to God if you say party..."

She laughed softly "no... well yes... but I meant we should go get some food." She suggested to me quietly.

I was tempted but ultimately shrugged.

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