arezoo | charles leclerc

CHAPTER 3: Amnesia

[SUMMER OF 2022]

leena liked poetic songs, she was persian after all. he had caught her singing multiple times, her voice different in every language she spoke. in farsi, her voice sounded heavenly while the depth of it would not travel across as much in english or french. she sang everything from edith piaf to those iranian bands he felt like the entire country listened to. he even suspected she was one of the members, given her extreme familiarity with them.

they were similar in that sense, both deeply taken by sad songs.  he always had said he was obsessed with depressing sad songs, so it should be no surprise that he found himself in the midst of amnesia by 5 seconds of summer. it wasn't his type, but the lyrics resonated differently with him. he really wished that he would wake up with amnesia, and forget about the stupid little things, like the way it felt to fall asleep next to her and the memories he never can escape.

the pictures of them together did still live in his phone, locked away in the hidden section of his camera roll. sometimes he forgets that they are there at all. he used to take pictures of her, all the time. he tried not to remind himself of the sd card of his first professional camera where he used to tell her to pose.

'janam, i'm sure there are better muses.' she denies, but still attempts to slide her fingers through her hair in an attempt to tame it. she flips her hair to one side and closes her eyes, the dark rim of her kohl hidden between her lashes. (dear)

he snaps a few pictures, basking in the candid-ness of them. she was a striking beauty, but an unconventional one.

'not when you're as gorgeous as you are.' he took another picture, squinting his eyes to look through the small lens of the camera, seeing the shy smile that lit her face in response.

'oh stop it. don't inflate my ego too much. i might have to go back to iran to check on the long list of suitors papa keeps showing me pictures of.'  the pictures of her talking were his favourite. she looked so intrigued and captivated with the other person.

'don't go around considering them mon cœur.'  he said teasingly.

'i'm not letting you go anytime soon.' she said with a sure smile on her face, as she relaxed from the laughter.

he guessed she didn't lie, since he was the one that let her go.
yet, charles would appreciate it if he stopped feeling like he was hallucinating seeing her everywhere. it was like she never left at all. 3 years since she disappeared completely without a trace from these streets. it was making him work harder to forget about her.

every since he read the first two letters, he had drove past all the places they used to hang out, subconsciously, with his marina, his present girlfriends. how could he not? monaco was a small place. that was the excuse he gave himself. suddenly leena's in the cafe down the road and she's sitting laughing by the harbour and she's by the hike trail he frequents, reading some book in her hand, her wavy hair tied up in a high ponytail that was verging on loosening up.

he really needed to see someone about this. because there was no way it really was her. he would know if it was her, but he felt like it was. besides, wouldn't she say something if she saw him in person?

'charles.' leilani bonked his head with a random magazine he had lying about in his apartment. they were supposed to be hanging out together in the only free time his girlfriend would allow them (leilani's words), but charles had gotten lost again. her eyes briefly flickered to the view of the other apartment he used to live in, before returning her gaze to her brother. 'come on, what is wrong with you?' she held both of his shoulders, and shook him lightly.

he stopped sulking and got off the egg chair in the balcony and stretched his arms. he really needed to stop over analysing these letters, especially since he didn't have a clue as to when each was sent. these could be from the very week they broke up, or could be from this year.

'i don't know,' he lied. he hesitated before continuing, realising that his sister would be the perfect person to confide with. he had acted as her confidant in their youth, and he hoped that agreement hadn't changed since their family breakup.

'have you ever felt like you keep seeing someone, but when you look closer, it's not them?' he tumbled over his words, since they were confusing and similar.

'occasionally, yeah. why?' leilani replied, crooking her head to the side.

'well this is not occasional. i feel like i have seen this person far too much for it to be coincidental. i see them everywhere, but everytime i get closer, it's someone else.' her face twisted in confusion at charles' words.

'well... i don't know what to say. are you thinking about this person a lot?'

'only because i'm going crazy seeing them everywhere.'

'are you sure?' he nodded, and leilani leaned back in the other chair to think about it. it's happened to me a few times. if i think too much about one person, usually if i was feeling restless after an argument, i see them around me or in my dreams.'

he guessed their 'big argument' had lasted four or so years.

'i, that makes sense.'

'it should, there's no other explanation because you keep imagining . except of course-' his sister's eyes widened comedically, trying to shift the seriousness of the conversation.

'except what?'

'you're being haunted by this person...' she laughed.

'be serious.'  he shook his head.

'don't rule it out as a possible explanation.'

'what should i do about it?' he sighed out, taking an apple slice from the little coffee table.

'how about talking to that person?'

'i don't have their contact.' he waited a second. 'let's forget about this. we're supposed to be making up for lost time. let's go.' he decided he didn't want to think about leena anymore, and used his sister as a way to forget about the fact that he felt like he was going insane.

'quick question. does your girlfriend know that you're thinking about leena this much?' he made a show of his mouth moving but no sound coming out. he will never understand how quick his sister was in deciphering his secrets.

there was no room for lies, especially given how frank she had been with him. 'no, and i'd rather she doesn't.'

'charles that's not fair.' leilani wasn't particularly fond of marina, but it wouldn't be exactly fair on her if her boyfriend was
obsessing over his ex while he was in her arms. she was a girls girl after all.

'i know, i just don't want to give marina up for someone who probably isn't even real.'

—

soooo sorry for this rubbish chapter. but please do comment and vote. tell me how it was, how you want to see this book go, anything!'

love you all,

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