Apologies From The Grave » bangchan

07

I never needed to take my life, Chan. Not a single suicidal person needs to take their life. 

I was so exhausted, I was so damaged, I was so depressed, I was so lonely. And I only saw the dead-end. 

You asked me to stay. You asked me to hold on a little longer. You asked me to stay for you. 

I'm sorry, I couldn't stay... not even for you. My own darkness overpowered all the kaleidoscope of light you tried to light up my vision with. I could have tried harder. I could have chosen to fight a little longer. I could have stayed for you, Chan. 

But I was so tired. 

I was tired of fighting. I needed to rest.

Yet, now, I see you fighting to stay alive, and I regret everything. 

Why did I do it? 

Chan, I am sorry. I should not have taken my own life.