EROS: The Light Project

SOLITUDE - THANATOS

Someone with the same face as me was slowly approaching me, and I him. We were walking under a starless sky, accompanied by a warm breeze.

The air flowed clear and light, yet it caused me intense chills.

After a few steps we came face to face; up close I realized that we had nothing in common outside of face: he was short and skinny, a bland reflection of my past, while I towered over him like a giant.

For a few seconds I thought I was looking again at Dame Adelaide wearing another mask. But there was something about that boy-something really....

Real.

He was me.

He was holding a baseball bat tightly in his hands and wearing a black tank top.

Almost without realizing it I spread my wings wide: they exploded in a second like fireworks, in all their glory.

-Who are you?‖ I asked him, in a tone of voice that made my discomfort damn clear.

-I am Nathan. Nathan Sesto- he told me all trembling.

-No, you are lying. I am Nathan Sesto-.

The little man's eyes widened in amazement.

-I...have I really become...like this?-he asked me admiringly.

-No. No. You are wrong. We have nothing in common-.

He scrutinized every part of me with heated interest, his eyes wide as marbles.

-You are right. We are really different, and yet...-.

I lowered myself to his height and looked into his eyes: -I want to know who you are. Tell me where you come from-.

He clasped his hands around the bat, as if at any moment he wanted to attack me.

-I am who I say I am, and nothing else. I am from Hell and I am looking for a person-.

-Amanda- I said immediately; -Amanda...you are looking for her, aren't you?

He looked at me with obvious surprise.

-I...I...I have never stopped looking for her-.

Without even thinking about it I tightened my arms around his chest and forcefully.

-You really are me!-I exclaimed.

He said nothing, but returned the embrace. Then I heard the baseball bat fall to the floor, abandoned by its master.

-What did they do to you? Why did they put you in Hell?-I asked him with compassion.

-I deserved to end up there- he answered me.

-No, no! You didn't. You don't deserve it at all. You...we...are worth much more than anyone else inhabiting Heaven-.

I tightened my arms even tighter around him. I could feel his heart beating fast.

-All this is false. Heaven, Hell...we are not really there. This is all the work of the human being-he whispered in my ear.

-I know...I know...I promise we will get out of this, together-.

We stayed close to each other for a few more seconds.

-Amanda is not here- I suddenly told him. -This is good news. The Human University has not taken control over her body. She is now free and probably...she is probably in a better place- he answered me naively.

I was not at all convinced of this: having come this far, I sincerely doubted that there was a real afterlife.

And maybe it would be for the best.