Sad Poems

Mind scattered

Look at you; you are making a fool of yourself, and you think I, your mind, will help you through? I turned my back on you years ago, and you now realize the truth. Why do you think your body couldn't come together to create a better you? Now, nobody even wants you. If the mind is not sane and stable, your body breaks apart and falls back into atoms.

Once you grow your roots out, then you'll have some type of spine. Until then, what comes and goes would be the cause of your mind. I'll break you, and build you back up again, but I will also be the one you'll see laughing at your puzzled face. I'll create a safe place but let that one person in that'll see there's not one, but twice as many of us inside. Once they learn to like us all, I'll let them inside my mind! Scared them off like, make them shiver inside.

Step one would be done, but they'll be back for more because they see a mental person and think they change them. My emotions are measured; negative inside, what comes around goes around, and I'll break you next time. But wait a moment. You're still in charge. You can fix this once you start spewing and masking your mistakes. I'll hide for that day and come back again like, "Hey.".

We're sick in the head, and how we plot revenge would make them think again. Before more troubles come, let the therapist sit and list the things that we already know, and we listen to them retell the stories of our life and how this could've happened. Smile as they list more and more things while we have the right to be deranged.

My mind is scattered, and my emotions are not in the right place. I Need a doctor, and they'll diagnose me, but then I go home and still don't know the real me, thinking, what did they help with? By telling me repeatedly how I'm crazy, I already knew this: don't call yourself help when all you do is prescribe me more and more things to knock my mental state off the track, and soon enough, I'll be a dead shell walking. Pretend I'm okay around my family, go inside my room and cry, tell myself it's fine, but then go out into the world asking!

"Why"

Why, every time I try, I sink more into the ocean? Why, every time I smile, it gets broken? Why, every time I try not to cry, someone hit me with that question? "Are you okay?" Why had no one asked me this before I was seriously hurt and broken? Why did nobody care when I was out there crying in public? Nobody asked if I was okay then what happened??? Suddenly, everyone can see through the crack of my emotions.

Someone sit me down and finally tell me it will be okay, break apart all those nasty thoughts that were uncontained! I will feel something now but then realize you're not to stay. You'll turn around and leave me just the rest of them. I'm enraged to think someone would stay and try to restore my self-esteem.

One era I may change and say goodbye to all the fakes. One day, I will hold you close so you can stay, tell you how much you mean to me, and find another fate; be patient with me as I regain my dignity. As you try to encourage me not to overthink, I would slip again and begin pushing you away. I can't let anyone close. Myself in the mirror can't stand me, why you? Why do you think you're special to gain my trust, honestly?

Quite useless. You're not worth the hassle. You thought this would be better. Did you? Cause even I lost who's the real me. I'll have to be reborn to get a whole new Identity.

"I've finally recovered. All that therapy paid off, ready to uncover; I finally can get off all these pills that drain my stability and energy. I can finally get a job that suits me, clean up, and recover the new me." They won't take the crap I endure, and I'll ensure it. The outside changed, but my mind was still there.

It's getting nearby! Time to hide from the fears of being hated and the patience to endure. It wasn't who I thought it was. All along, I was betraying myself for all those years. My self-worth, my self-esteem, and my self-look. My attitude towards myself was overlooked. As I do for others, I can let myself off the hook.

Fishing for stability, fishing for my hopes and dreams, fishing for the biggest regret, to apologize to me for letting things fall apart so fast. One day, I can let the old me come to pass and grab onto that stirring wheel, watch my brain finally give the right direction for my blood to flow, my heart pumping some sense into me. I got my mind and spirit where I want them. You will not tell me otherwise.

I'm in complete control of my body and my mind significantly. I won't let you dictate how I live my life; I need to drop all my trauma back to that year of happening, and I will move on without it. I can leave you here to rot. Not the past, future, or the present would want you nearby. Stow the bags of your negative thoughts and get out of my mind. You are a betrayer, just like the heart, next in line to be torn apart.