I know your secret. ( Revamp )

To Blame. ( Korekiyo's pov )

That ugly feeling of guilt haunted me again, I watched R/N run into their home. While I just stood in agony. I didn't move, I couldn't move. I found myself watching the door, waiting for it to open. Yet it didn't. I knew R/N couldn't handle yelling yet, it just came out of me. They just tried to help me feel better and I made them feel worse then how I was feeling. I brought myself to begin walking away from their home, I felt so guilty yet I couldn't bring myself to even walk up to the door and apologize. They needed time away from me. Humans process so differently and for R/N they processed differently than I did. Luckily my home was not far from theirs, I walked in silence as I listened to the birds sing and the wind dance. Even with the world so at peace I was fighting with myself on the inside.
Once I made it home, I climbed up the stairs of the apartment building and made my way to the front door, when I rummaged through my bag I felt my phone. Apart of me wanted to grab it, apologize over and over again. Though my hand kept digging, I grabbed my house key and opened the door to the smell of popcorn. It was strong, I covered my nose for a second because the aroma of butter was overwhelming for me. I walked down the hall and looked into the lounge room. Miyadera was watching a movie, Although she clearly heard my footsteps because she was already off the couch ready to give me a hug. My father was on the couch as well with a. bowl of popcorn as his head was turned towards me and Miyadera now. "Korekiyo! You came home very late..we were going to watch this movie with you but you took so so long..eheh..~ I'm so happy you're home now so you can spend some time with me..oh- and father of course.." She wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me in for a hug, I did not return it. "..Miyadera I think I am just going to head to bed, it has been a long day for me." She pulled away from the hug slowly dragging her arms away but leaving her hands on both of my shoulders. "..What's wrong dear brother? You sound disturbed." I looked briefly to my father who had his head turned back to the tv. Then my eyes landed on Miyadera again. "..I think it's best if we do not talk about it." I removed her hands from my shoulders, as I turned my body away from her, she moved to be in front of me again. "..You can tell me anything-! Did R/N do something to you..!? Dear brother I know you are concerned for them but please I am your sister!" I felt my body cringe with how un-sincere she was being. "I did something to them, that is my fault, I need time to reflect my actions, I need to think of a way to apologize to them." I tried moving past my sister but she blocked me as she gripped her hands onto both of my forearms. "..You don't have to blame yourself for their doing. Did they manipulate you..? Oh my poor brother..so weak and fragile." My head was moving between if Miyadera had been right about R/N or if R/N was right about Miyadera. "..I would like to be alone." I smoothly replied as I tried to move past her, she blocked my path as I looked down at her again. "Miyadera." I spoke, She looked to me determined to get an answer out of me. "..You can be honest with me Kiyo!" It made me feel ill, I had already felt sick but this made it worse. R/N was right about Miyadera, but..Was Miyadera right about R/N? R/N had always been kind to me..and yet, I still snapped. I felt nauseous, feeling my legs get achey was the worst, feeling the tears start to well up in my eyes. "..Just leave me alone Miyadera." Was the most I could make out of my words.
       I walked by her and went straight to my room closing the door, finally, quiet. People had always interested me, I loved learning about them, however humans can be quite irritating if you couldn't get alone with them, I set down my bag along my bedside and sat on my bed. I opened my bag and grabbed my phone. No messages, Fuck. I messed up, really messed up which made me grab my stomach in pain. Was it pain? Or was it anxiety? I put my phone onto my bed. Pinching the bridge of my nose as my heart rate increased. My anxiety was worsening, perhaps seeing someone about this would be best. "..Kiyo? Hun is everything okay? Your sister said you didn't look so good." I looked to my door, I guess I hardly noticed anyone had knocked. My mother walked into my room as she sat beside me rubbing my back. "..Kiyo..! Good heavens you know you are sweating up a pond back here.. What's going on?" She flinched her hand away for a moment before placing it back onto my back. "..It's just R/N mama. Nothing serious I suppose." "-Nothing? Kiyo you look so pale, which isn't unusual for you but this looks more like you're sick, why don't I get you a wet towel? I'll have it back to you in one moment." She got up and walked out of my room leaving my door open, from the corner of my eye I saw Miyadera staring at me when the door opened, although her figure disappeared with our mother. I laid down on my bed as I turned on the lamp next to my bed. Ut felt worse, without R/N school would be hell, they always stuck up for me, was I going to lose R/N? I felt so sick. My head sunk into my pillow as I felt my body clench up. Without R/N I wouldn't feel so safe at school, without R/N..Miyadera would just seen as a loving sister to me. I heard my door squeak as my mother came back into put a towel on my head. "..Kiyo, Get some rest, if you need to skip tomorrow you may. Although I have to take your sister to the hospital so you would come with us too." I shut my eyes, relaxing to the sound of my mothers voice. "..What's wrong now..?" I softly said, the thought of being stuck at the hospital, bored me. "..Aah, Just insurance stuff. We have to get it worked out with her doctor, I'm also thinking at this point we should get her the treatment.." My mother's hand rubbed my back slowly. "..She does not want it."
      I felt her hand pause for a moment, did she not know Miyadera did not want the treatment? "It..will have to be done at some point, she is getting worse. I do hope she is not giving up her talent just because of her illness. She told me she was stepping out of the talent exam! That girl..I suppose I could talk her back into it." "..Don't try to. She has made up her mind." Secretly I was covering for R/N. That is also why I shouldn't stay home. For R/N. "..Miyadera loves her talent! I don't want her to give that up because she is sick..do you think she needs time?" My eyes remained shut as my mother turned off the lamp beside my bed. "There is only two more days before the talent exam, you wouldn't be able to give her time with two days." She giggled, Kissing my cheek as she got up from my bed. "..I know, however maybe It wouldn't hurt to talk to her about it. Goodnight Kiyo." She shut my door. With that, I ended up falling asleep still with my school clothes on.