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{Warning - talk of SA abuse drugs swearing violence knife blood }
Dying is such a weird feeling I never thought I would be feeling it so young it's like you can't breathe but you can everything slows down everything quiet Very peaceful the pain is slowly leaving everything goes black I can hear them but only softly I can hear my own heart beat getting slower.
I wonder what's after death is it really what people say it is because if it is I'm ready I want to see my dad ( big John) I want him to hold me and tell me that his been watching us that his proud of us that nothing can hurt me anymore but if I died that would kill johnb and Jj and maybe even rafe and topper.
God topper we are not as close as me and johnb but he been a good brother yeah I feel bad for him trying his best to get daddy's and mummy approval all the time I always wonder when my mum would stop the lying and just tell my dad (mr Thornton ) I'm not his or does he know is that why he would hurt me is that why he gave me these scars because he knew the whole time god dam it why me
Johnb pov
Seeing her laying there in the hospital bed is killing me rafe yelling at topper because his parents left and won't be back for another month Jj is trying to get my attention Sarah is now here with pope and Kie and Jessie well the police have him I hope she's okay god dad if you can here me please don't let her die she's to young she has to much to live for god I'm saying this in my head like you can actually here me shit this is going to turn out so bad if you die sis I don't think I will be able to handle this much pain I think this hurts more then dad and I know that may seem selfish and nasty but y/n is all I have left I mean I have Jj and the other but she all the blood family I have left god damm it why her
Doc- Johnb routledge
Jb- yes that's me
Doc- I want to talk to you about y/n
Topper- wait what no I'm her brother his just her friend
Doc- sorry but she has down here if her parents are not here that johnb is the only one we can talk to and since she's 18 we have to go by these rules
Topper- wtf
Johnb- look just tell me here they are her family it's fine
Doc- the stab has went through pretty deep hitting a lung
(I actually don't know if it's the lung I'm your side so I'm just saying that)
We will have to take her for surgery
Johnb- okay well do it
Doc - look it's more complicated then you think and I don't feel like discussing this in-front of everyone y/n should be okay for know and she should wake up very soon should I wait to see what she said
Johnb- if she will be fine until then Then yes wait for her to wake up
Doc- okay well it should be soon but it may take longer just depends on her it's all up to her know if she's strong enough or she can just let it all go and stop fighting I'm only telling you this because I don't want to give you hope then take it alway because she does
Johnb- thank you so much can we see her or
Doc- maybe In an hour I'll come out and get you but I'm sorry johnb will be the only one and it's only because we are going by the paper work she filled out before her birthday
Johnb- that's okay thank you so much
Topper- this is bill shit I'm her real brother her blood brother I'm calling mum and dad
Sarah- TOPPER SHUT UP where is your mum and dad huh because they were here when we told you she was stabbed and they still left knowing their own daughter was stabbed
Jj- okay okay this is not helping anyone just all calm down and think about y/n and what she would want she would still chose johnb either way and we all know It so everyone just shut up and be quiet
Rafe pov
I find it weird that y/n would out johnb as that person but they are pretty close I have a feeling there more to the story then she's telling me I definitely don't think it's like live in boyfriend way but love like brother but I can't help but think they seem like they are real brother and sister but god who cares right now all I should be thinking about is if she's going to be okay I know the doctor say she was waking up but she didn't really seem that confident when she said she should be okay god why am I so bloody stupid I should have told her I love her I should have never let her go damm it please me okay
Jj pov
It's been 5 hours since the doctor came out every one is just sitting around wondering what is going on this is just all so much I can't believe she's going through this shit again after her cousin and whoever gave her the scars her and rafe she's gone through so much but why why did this happen to her what did she do she does everything she's told she loves to follow the rules she does everything for her family and they treat her like some trophy that can be hand out to we dad's business mates sons she stays quiet till her dad tells her to talk she I walk down the long hall way to go to the toilet but when I look it's her laying in the bed her hair all in her face I walk in and pull her hair back I sit in the chair forgetting about needing to go to the god I'm so sorry this happened to you damm it please me okay princess
Johnb - Jj how did you get in here
Jj- shit sorry I just seen her and came in
Johnb close the door
Johnb- it's okay stay she would want both of us here do you think
Jj- she's going to make it I know she is so please don't even think about saying it
Doctor - hey sorry to interrupt but it's time you chose Johnb we were hoping she would wake up but she needs this or she won't make it
Johnb- do the surgery then
Dc- okay but it's more complicated it may harm or kill her baby
