Till Forever is Ours

07.

I MADE MY WAY TO ENGLISH IN A DAZE. I didn't even realize when I first walked in that class had already started.

"Thank you for joining us, Miss Bishop," Mr. Barton said in a disparaging tone.

I flushed and hurried to my seat.

It wasn't till class ended that I realized Billy wasn't sitting in his usual seat next to me. I felt a twinge of guilt. But he and Peter both met me at the door as usual, so I figured I wasn't totally unforgiven. Billy seemed to become more himself as we walked, gaining enthusiasm as he talked about the weather report for this weekend.

The rain was supposed to take a minor break, so maybe his beach trip would be possible. I tried to sound eager, to make up for disappointing him yesterday. It was hard; rain or no rain, it would still only be in the high forties, if we were lucky.

The rest of the morning passed in a blur. It was difficult to believe that I hadn't just imagined what Yelena had said, and the way her eyes had looked. Maybe it was just a very convincing dream that I'd confused with reality. That seemed more probable than that I appealed to her on any level.

So I was impatient and frightened as America and I entered the cafeteria. I wanted to see her face, to see if she'd gone back to that cold, indifferent person I'd known for the last several weeks. Or if, by some miracle, I'd really heard what I thought I'd heard this morning. America babbled on and on about her dance plans— Cassie and Michelle had asked the other boys and they were all going together— completely unaware of my inattention.

Disappointment flooded through me as my eyes unerringly focused on her table. The other four were there, but she was absent. Had she gone home? I followed the still-babbling America through the line, crushed. I'd lost my appetite— I bought nothing but a bottle of lemonade. I just wanted to go sit down and sulk.

"Yelena Belova is staring at you again," America said, finally breaking through my abstraction with her name. "I wonder why she's sitting alone today."

My head snapped up. I followed her gaze to see Yelena, smiling crookedly, staring at me from an empty table across the cafeteria from where she usually sat. Once she'd caught my eye, she raised one hand and motioned with her index finger for me to join her. As I stared in disbelief, she winked.

"Does she mean you?" America asked with insulting astonishment in her voice.

"Maybe she needs help with her Biology homework," I muttered for her benefit. "Um, I'd better go see what she wants."

I could feel her staring after me as I walked away. When I reached her table, I stood behind the chair across from her, unsure.

"Why don't you sit with me today?" she asked, smiling.

I sat down automatically, watching her with caution. She was still smiling. It was hard to believe that someone so beautiful could be real. I was afraid that she might disappear in a sudden puff of smoke, and I would wake up.

She seemed to be waiting for me to say something.

"This is different," I finally managed.

"Well..." She paused, and then the rest of the words followed in a rush. "I decided as long as I was going to hell, I might as well do it thoroughly."

I waited for her to say something that made sense. The seconds ticked by.

"You know I don't have any idea what you mean," I eventually pointed out.

"I know." She smiled again, and then she changed the subject. "I think your friends are angry with me for stealing you."

"They'll survive." I could feel their stares boring into my back.