ditto

chapter eight

"you're so pretty, when you smile, it kills me, oh. can't stop thinking 'bout the way you kissed me, under the stars"
ur so pretty - wasia project

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(ariannah's pov)

i was in a hurry to find everyone else eventually i found lillianna and carmen. i was breathing really heavily. i couldn't believe that i saw him again after all this time. did it have to be here?! right now?!

"what's wrong" "are you ok" they asked. "i just saw kian again" i told them. they both knew about the kian situation. after i had stopped talking to halle they became my support.

we went to find the others and once we did carmen and lilianna told them that we had to leave. we finished up and we headed out to eat something. i was so glad we weren't there anymore i was still struggling to wrap my head around what had happened.

once we got back to sariah's house we all showered up and decided we would bake something.

once we finished baking, we gathered up with all of our pillows, blankets and snacks in the living room to watch a movie.

morgan and alena lied on the floor, carmen and lillianna sat on the couch. they knew what they were doing they let me sit on the same couch as sariah.

at this point i didn't mind, as i sat down next to her and got comfortable. sariah looked at me and asked "what does your tattoo mean?" "it's a word my grandmother called me, i got it tattooed to honor her" i told her.

"it's really pretty" she said "do you have any others?" "i'm planning on getting a lotus tattoo soon and i'm planning to get the lyrics to my favorite song tattooed as well" i explained.

"what's your favorite song?" "congratulations by mac miller" i told her. for the rest of the night we just watched movies and had fun. eventually we all ended up falling asleep on our second movie.

i was really thankful that i was with them when i saw kian. if i would have been alone i would have driven straight home and ran to my room to cry in the dark.
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(sariah's pov)

it was the day after the sleepover and everyone had already gone home, i was up in my room practicing on my guitar.

i was adding more and more to the song i was writing. i found myself thinking of ariannah as i was starting to write the lyrics.

ur so pretty
when you smile it kills me

i like her so much and i don't know if she feels the same. sometimes it feels like she does but other times it feels like we would be better off just as friends.

i had never felt anything like this for anyone. i know she had a past relationship, i also know that it was very hard for her because they had dated for two years. but i also know that it was especially hard for her because her ex didn't care that he cheated publicly on her with the most popular girl in school, bella.

i've only been in one relationship. it was with someone from middle school. we lasted a month but i never felt anything for him. the only reason i said yes was because i felt really bad for saying no.

eventually i realized i wasn't into guys and that i only really felt something for girls.

i was adding more to the song and then eventually i just hit a wall. i didn't really know what to do. immediately i remembered last night when she told me her favorite song.

maybe i could learn that song. i knew it was going to be her birthday soon, that could what i could gift her.

yeah. that's what i could give her. i started to learn how to play it. i realized why it was her favorite song. it was so beautiful.
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(ariannah's pov)

i was sketching in my book just relaxing and listening to music. i was hungry so i went down to get a late night snack. then i got a text from alena.

"hey ariannah, i just wanted to make sure you were ok after seeing kian today. i know that must have been hard in you" she said.

"yeah im ok, thanks for asking. yeah it was very hard, it's like all the memories of him and i just rushed into my head again after i had promised myself that i would never let myself think of them again." i responded

"yeah i know it's hard but i also know that it's not healthy to not talk about your feeling and instead bury them like they aren't important. but especially considering how badly he broke your heart last year." she said

i didn't respond because even if i didn't want to admit it i knew she was right. i knew that it would be better if i just talked about my feeling more openly, or at least that what everyone would tell me.

but it was difficult. putting yourself out there. being open about your feelings.

i didn't want to put myself out there just to end up being hurt again. i opened my heart to kian and he shattered it into pieces.

i went back upstairs, then i started to lie down when i got a text notification.

it was kian.

912 words.