When The Tiger Lilies Bloom | Taekook

25. When The Tigerlilies Bloom

A wave of pain, or an explosion of hurt, or even the disappointment that lingered- Jungkook and Taehyung looked at each other, not knowing what to say or think. Taehyung was the one who dropped the bomb and with the way Jungkook was gasping for air, he knew the other had got what he meant.

Of course, Jungkook can hide it with a lie, he could tell that the painting does not belong to him, he could run away like all the time they skipped each other and they can go back to their life where they were unknown to each other. But were they though?

Jungkook felt like he was spiraling in a storm, eyes blurred with the water force, hands and legs were helplessly floating in the air and he was feeling numb all over again. He wished the time to stop so that he could escape to his safe place. Only if he could.

But now looking at Taehyung, witnessing the hurt lingering in the eyes of the other, Jungkook knew everything was a messed up story and it was too late for him to explain.

"I don't want to know anything, Jungkook. I just... I was not supposed to see it, but--"

"It's not you, Taehyung"

Jungkook knew he sounded harsh, wounded, and blunt. He was bleeding inside with the words that were too harmful for him to keep in his heart. Taehyung had always been there.

Taehyung with his big eyes that were filled with surprise, with his lips jutted out in a pout, with his perfect nose and boxy smile, with his messy hair and long fingers curling around the wooden brush, leaving bold strokes of paint on the canvases.

Jungkook had seen that Taehyung a lot. He likes to see Taehyung with the halo of happiness around him. But, this Kim Taehyung in front of him was different and Jungkook couldn't pinpoint exactly what it was and why he was feeling sad about it.

"It's not you. It's someone--"

"Someone who looks like me, right?"

It felt like Taehyung wanted to hear a yes from him and Jungkook didn't know if he said it, would it be a lie rather than the truth.

It would be a big lie that he wanted to tell himself that he never painted Taehyung, he never memorized how Taehyung looked in a golden dusk, on evenings like this, with paints on his white shirt, hair falling on his eyes and red lips biting while he was in full concentration.

Jungkook wished everything from Kim Hansung to Kim Taehyung was a lie. But sadly, reality hurts more than anything.

"I wish you could tell me, you know... I would understand, Jungkook. If you'd tell me that--"

"That what? I'm in love with someone and I can't have them. I can never even wish for them, yet like a fool, I'm going on day by day thinking that one day-- freaking one day, I could meet him again. Is that what you want to hear, Taehyung?"

To say Taehyung was shocked would be an understatement. He thought being in love was the most sickening thing in the world. But when he heard Jungkook, he felt like being in love was fine, but the unfortunate truth of not having his lover by his side was the worst thing he could ever imagine.

He doesn't hate Jungkook, he can't nor does he have any right when Jungkook did nothing wrong. In fact, he was thankful.

Taehyung felt grateful to have that closure he was not even searching for, that he didn't know he wanted until that moment. Now he can hate himself for loving Jungkook.

"Why? Why can't you have them?"

Jungkook was taken aback by the question, especially with the heaviness in Taehyung's voice and the pain that reverberated in his words. He looked awestruck not knowing what to say, even more surprised by the fact that Taehyung wanted to know.