White Lillies

You were 5 when your father decided you were a squib.

That you didn't have magic.

Because even Draco, who was only 3, started floating his toys around the nursery at only a year old. And you are 5 and your toys have yet to leave the ground.

When Lucius, because as he said, you aren't his daughter anymore, packed all of your clothes into a suitcase, you didn't flinch.

After all, Malfoy's don't show when they are afraid. And your fathers rage is one thing you're truly afraid of.

You don't flinch when he shoves you into the hallway and sends a jinx at your feet so you tumble. You don't flinch when he screams in your face and spittle gets on your cheek.

You do flinch when the broken sobs of your mother reach your ears. Crying out for her baby girl who she will never see again. And when you turn the corner and see your mother, who has always been composed and has never broken down, standing there with blotchy red stained cheeks, carrying a crying Draco. You realize you'll miss your mum. Because even though your father will become Lucius, your mother will always be your mum.

And your sweet baby brother Draco. Who was clinging onto your mothers robes for dear life, unsure of what is going on, you know you'll miss him the most.

You'll miss when he would come barreling into your room to wake you up, when you would play hide and seek throughout the manner.

You'll miss the times you would cohere a house-elf to sneak cookies and milk just for the two of you, and you'll miss when the two of you would lay out in the gardens behind the bushes of white lilies and stare at the clouds.

So when Lucius grabs onto your shoulder and maneuvers you out of the only home you have ever known, you mourn the loss of your mother and brother. Who will never get to share the joy of magic with again. Who you will never get to tell about the bad teachers at Hogwarts or share a funny story about your charms class. Who you will never be able to guide through the joys of life and shelter him through the sorrows of it.

You'll never see your baby brother grow.

And that, you muse as your fath-no Lucius, steers you out of the manor and to the edge of the grounds where you have never ventured before, will probably be the worst thing.

When he turns you around to see your first and only home you have ever had for the last time, you lock your eyes with your brother. The same grey you have, the same shade and shape. You look at the platinum blond of your baby brother's hair that is a shade lighter than yours, but you both have the curls you share with your mother.

And as a tear falls down your cheeks for the first time that day, you feel the tug at your navel and couldn't help but wonder.

Will he ever know how much you love him?

———

Lucius drops you off with a lady named June. June has a husband, Arnold, and a set of 9 year old twins, Katie and Anthony.

June and Arnold are squibs. Their children are muggles. They live in a muggle town in the city of Southampton. They send you to Muggle school. They call it Primary school, and you suppose it could be worse.

You quickly find out that June is a lot like your mother in some ways and completely different in others. She gives affection freely. You can see that she loves her children unconditionally, which is very similar to your mother. The difference lies when you are in public. June doesn't care about giving affection freely while in public. She will give you a pat on the head and a hug if she wants too. You could sit on her lap at the table in a restaurant and fall asleep in her arms while at the park.