interview

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„This is your territory?....So your the leader of a gang?" The reporter looks at me provocatively thinking she did something.
I smirk amused. „I mean yea. Depends on your definition." I hold her eye contact. „I took over this territory after Lin died."
„Wait." The confused reporter interrupts. „Depends on my definition? What does that's mean?"
She's still sceptical. Understandable.
„As I just said I took over. This territory was in a gangs hand. They smuggled drugs, weapons, animals & humans. Yk, everything you can think of."
„Why would you over take? On your socials you claim to be ethical? It's smuggling ethical to you?" She's getting really excited.
„Oh my gosh. No! Never." I inhale deeply. My fingers find my forehead. They massage it while I close my eyes.
Was this a bad idea?
„I'll need you to let me finish my thoughts before you intervene." My eyes open & I put on a pleasant smile. She nods.
„Like I said, it was ruled by a criminal organization. When the head of the gang died, I had to choices."
long pause.
„No, let's start different." Searching for the right words, my gaze wanders through the room. Over the reporter to the camera team and my people.
I can't believe I'm doing this.
I start talking with a serious tone in my voice.  „When I found Lin dead, I knew what it meant. I've been working for him for 2 years - as a cleaner. I'm sure he thought I didn't know who he was or what he does. He was good in what he did. I mean good as in he did not get caught by the police - not good as in ethical. His business was full of men. Businesses like his still are until this day. So he never saw independent, strong women. The only women he did see were the one he sex trafficed. And me. To come to the point he underestimated me - a lot. I could search in his things for hours. I could eavesdrop his conversations, tape his call & even see his goods. I was right under his nose & about to explode. But then he died. He was killed by local resistance fighters. Resistance to his cruelty. Sadly most of the girls died in battle - it isn't easy taking down such a big fish. As I came to my daily cleaning routine, I saw the dead - all of them. And I had two choices. I could leave - let all of this behind me. Maybe even take some money & live a good life. Or I could take over." I cross my legs & straighten my shoulders.
„Now you may ask: Why would I stay her & not make myself a luxurious life? Why would I become „the leader of the gang" - as you call me - & then call it ethical? - The answer is: I wanted better. In the two years I worked here, I saw everything & I could do nothing against it. All these people that were killed, tortured & trafficed. It was obvious that if I go, another men will take over & continue the reign of terror. Lin was dead, but that didn't mean cruelty was."
„So you're saying because you're a women you're a better leader." Again she look at me provocatively. I just laugh.
„NoNoNo. All the leaders are men. I'm the first women. And I'm the first person who want to do better. That's not because I'm a women but rather due to my empathie. Something every person potentially has." The pleased spark leaves the reporters eyes & she nods again.
„I want to be better & I wanted this place to be better. So I took over to make up a game under my rules.  These rules are ethical or trying to be. We put as much effort as we can in being good - good as in ethical and good as in the police doesn't catch us." I wink at my wife in the back. She takes her gun & pretends to shot me with the cutest smile on her lips.
„So I started building my business which is no business at all. We don't smuggle. Actually we have rules here forbidding drugs & pimping. And in contrast to law these rules are obeyed."
„Why would you hide from the police when you're really ethical?" This time she seems interested.
„We are working against the laws. Since we have our own rules etc. We are messing with the government & their power. That's why we are careful but not hiding - the government is to unstable to really do something against us."
„Sorry to interrupt again. So you build a state within the state? THAT'S why you're trying to stay under the radar. Why talking to me?" The journalist bites her nails.
„My wife advised me to." I meet my women's gaze & she blushes. As my eyes find the reporter again, I spot her confused face.
Sometimes I forget people are not used to the normalization of queerness.
„She thought we could reach a lot of people & therefore start doing good."
She has caught herself again.
„How do you guarantee to be better? How do you finance it if you're not smuggling?"
She finally takes us seriously.
"I'll show you."

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