Do It All Again • N.H.

1.

Silence fills the soccer field as Wesley stands on the penalty arc with the ball in front of him. Niall is standing in front of the goal waiting for him to try and get the ball past him.

Wesley can hardly focus on the shot because all he can think about is how he made his mom feel earlier.

He knows how hard she's had it for the last five years and instead of being someone she could rely on, he turned into someone she had to protect herself from.

Nothing was scarier than being someone Emery needed to protect herself from.

"You okay, bud?" Niall asked reading the distraction all over his face.

"I don't know," he replied wanting to be honest with him. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Of course!"

Wesley looks up at his dad wanting to see his honest reaction. "Do you ever think about leaving mom? Starting a new life?"

The duo maintain eye contact as Niall breathes out trying to find the right way to say this. But there is no right way to answer this.

He believes that if he say yes, Wesley will think he is a horrible person who is ready to walk out on his family. If he says no, Wesley will pity him for loving a woman who has no interest in loving him back anymore.

"I don't think about leaving your mom," Niall said completely honest. "But I do think about what it would be like if she left me. Where would I go? What would I do? How would I feel? I never quite find the answer to those questions though. Instead, I remember that I've been with your mom for 18 years. I remember that I've always pictured my life with her; even when it didn't seem possible. I've always stayed and loved her. Why would now be any different?"

"Because neither of you are happy," Wesley said instantly, shocking the both of them.

Niall's nods his head as he looks down at the ground trying to find the words to explain how he feels about Emery.

But words are just words without action.

He can say that loving Emery is infinite for him but his actions don't reflect that. His actions reflect a man who doesn't care about his wife.

But maybe, just maybe, he wants to care about her the way he used to. He just doesn't know how to care about someone who doesn't want anyone to care about her anymore.

"Me and your mom are a bit more complicated than that," he said not knowing how to describe everything him and Emery are.

"But aren't you always suppose to be happy when you love someone?" He said not wanting to let this topic go.

Niall puts his hands on his hips as he looks up to the sky and lets out a deep breathe. Wesley usually didn't ask him so many questions.

He was the type of kid that would just take an answer from them and not question it because he knew his parents knew best. But there comes a time in every child's life when they realize that their parents don't always know best.

Parents are just trying their best. Even if it's not good enough.

"Love is more complicated than that," Niall said as he looked over at his boy. "Love, true love, isn't about the butterflies and the sparks. Ya see, those are fun at the beginning but they always end up dying out as time goes on. Love is about finding someone who feels like home and choosing to walk through their front door everyday. Even when it's hard and impossible. You still come home to them."

"I guess you just have to make sure your home doesn't become a haunted house," Wesley said again not missing a beat.

Niall looks at him, a bit annoyed, and asks "When did you get so smart?"

Wesley chuckles a little bit and says "Have you met my mother? She is a literal genius."

"That's true," he laughs then quickly decides to crouch down as he throws his hands up in the air and blocks the goal. "Now let's see if you can get the ball past your old man!"

"Of course I can!" Wesley said as he laughs. "You literally look like a crab right now."

"It should be easy then?"

Wesley shakes his head at his goofy dad then looks down at the ball and takes a few steps back.

He imagines the ball as all of his family's problems and if he can kick it hard enough then they'll disappear forever; leaving them to be a happy family again.

He lets out a deep breathe then run at the ball and kicks it towards his dad. However, he was too blinded by his anger and kicked the ball right into the goal post causing it to come back at him then hit him in the head.

Wesley falls to the ground making everything go black.