Our first meeting.
To me , you were a new toy🪀
One I thought I'd get bored of fast.
Soon it all changed
You were not just a new toy🪀
We were more than acquaintances 👫
You were my drug💊
My addiction.
Carefully indulging me
You withdrew suddenly
You're leaving but never gone
You never left the round corner
Always at arms reach
To keep watch
Never letting me go astray.
Withdrawal left a gaping hole 🕳️
in my chest.
Leaving my heart 🫀to the cold winds 🌪️
It's threatening to devour me whole
Withholding even my bones🦴
Or maybe it's the genes
My bloodline 🩸 threatening to ruin me.
The spasms and pain intertwined 🧬
Makes me feel sick down to my stomach
The unseen hands jab and tear at me.
My insides torn and mangled
Gnawed to pieces under your assault
Under your incessant torture
Desire to possess.
Regardless of my feelings or needs
You bully me
Hour🕛 after hour🕐
Day after day📆
Sometimes intervals are inputted
A month.
Sometimes two or maybe more.
Your incessant desire,
I keep up with.
I seem to be unparalleled in that aspect.
Pills 💊
I take to hold back my craving for you .
But I forgot.
You're a double edged sword 🗡️.
You've hurt me so many times,
I seem to love the quietness in the aftermath
The explicit care.
It all seems to appeal to me.
Regardless of how you've hurt me.
But maybe, it's time for you to let me go.
Even though I can't completely remove the shackles.
I walk with my head held high.
Even though I'm not without scars.
Even if I'm already a broken doll
Like a puppet without it's strings,
I'll keep moving forward.
Never again will I miss your fiery skin on cold nights.
Or the addictive pleasure that comes from withdrawal.
Xoxo.
YOU ARE READING
FLEETING THOUGHTS
General FictionWriting poems for the blues. To let my inner voice have her own podium. Just for fun actually. Or maybe not, depends on how you interpret it, It still all depends on the human mind And heart in the end.
