Reckless | Dorian Pavus | Dragon Age ✔

Reckless | Chapter Two

The Inquisitor sadly couldn't stay in his room all day. He had to mingle with others, give orders to the people of Skyhold, and stay far away from Dorian; in high hopes of finding his family. Ozen took Varric's word, letting his companions know about the plan of going to the Plains to search there. The Inquisitor stood before everyone, all of them looking at him, as he picked out the people he needed at his side. Sadly, one of them had to be Dorian. He was a healing mage and specialized in bringing others back from being unconscious. He was too important to be left out. Not only that but he was a witness to the disappearance of his family. Ozen knew he needed to be the bigger man and discuss his emotions with Dorian but instead, the elf just glared at him. Dorian could barely make eye contact with the Inquisitor. He wanted to talk to him but his emotional wounds were too fresh. Dorian felt guilty for what happened that day but Dorian also knew it wasn't his fault. It surely could have been prevented.

As they prepared for the journey ahead, Dorian dared to walk to the stables so he could attempt to talk sense into Ozen. Dorian set foot into the stable, making eye contact with their Grey Warden friend. Dorian moved his head slightly, letting Blackwall know he wanted a moment alone with their Inquisitor. It wasn't much of a private conversation but Dorian didn't trust the black-bearded man who always seemed to frown upon everything the Inquisitor wanted for his mission. In Dorian's eyes, Blackwall showed no proper respect.

"What do you need, Dorian?"

Ozen's voice sent shockwaves through Dorian's chest. Dorian frowned, his hands were in front of his chest, mindlessly fidgeting. He shifted his weight to his left foot, trying to think of anything besides I am sorry.

"We were on the beach. Your little sister wanted to find pretty rocks." Dorian found himself whispering. The memory of that day was still fresh in his mind. It took him a week to travel back to Skyhold, dreading to give word of the mission. What he hated the most was that Ozen never heard it from his mouth. Ozen had learned of the information from his ambassadors. It made Dorian feel sick.

Ozen stood there, petting his beautiful Pride of Arlathan. Dorian kept talking, even though it was killing him inside.

"She was right there, Ozen...." Dorian whispered. Ozen heard the crack in his voice. Ozen cupped the cheek of his Pride of Arlathan, trying hard not to tear up along with Dorian. Dorian took a deep breath,

"She was so cute playing in the water. She ran up to me and had me hold the rocks she found." Dorian chuckled, "Your parents had gone to gather materials for the trip here. They were close by, I can hear them talking. Then out of nowhere, bright red flashes occurred. Then a rift opened up, right above this boulder by the river."

Dorian grew quiet.

The memory of that night seemed to have blurred. He remembered seeing Ozen's sister. She wad running across the river. Dorian had his staff ready to fight. He saw the creatures. The dreadful creatures, along with red templars. They were coming out of nowhere. Before he could react with a spell, with anything, he heard the blood-curdling scream of Meryl. Ozen's mother. Dorian charged after the demon who had her in its grasp. He had cast a spell, hoping to turn that foul creature into a dark mist. Instead, the demon threw it back at Dorian. Dorian flew back, slamming against the boulder. He tried to use his magic but he was disoriented. His staff lay in front of him, broken. All Dorian could hear amongst the chaos was the screams of a child. She was screaming his name. Pleading for the mage to do something. Dorian remembered how much the back of his head throbbed. How blurry his vision was. He stumbled in front of himself, reaching for his broken staff, whispering an incantation under his breath, hoping that something would work. As Dorian gathered the strength to get to his feet, they were gone.

The demons. They took them. They snatched him out of his grasp. Dorian felt lost in the memories. All he could do was repeat his sorrows. The screams. Her screams. Dorian stood frozen. Ozen turned around, hearing that Dorian had trailed off. He saw the mage standing in place, his hands shaking. His eyes looking in front of him. Ozen frowned, walking to him. Ozen kept calling out to him but there was nothing. Dorian was in shock, fear had penetrated him.

"Dorian, this isn't funny."

Ozen put his hands on Dorian's shoulders and started to shake him. The few merchants that they had in Skyhold were starting to look towards Dorian and Ozen. Ozen saw their glances, trying his best to ignore them. Ozen sighed, wishing he didn't have to do this. Ozen pulled his hand back and smacked Dorian across the face. Dorian snapped back to reality, his hand flying up to his cheek. He then glared at Ozen. Before Dorian could say anything, Ozen put his finger to his lips. Dorian took a calming breath to calm his racing heart.

"Let's meet in my chambers." Ozen whispered, "so we can talk privately."

Ozen moved past Dorian, talking with the merchants and explaining how everything was alright. Dorian could hear Ozen walk away, but instead of following the man, Dorian stood in place. His cheek still throbbed. He still blamed himself for what happened to Ozen's family. He was useless in that fight. He could have easily taken them on but he was taken by surprise. It all happened so quickly. He couldn't think. Ozen trusted him and Dorian had let him down. All he could do was blame himself. With what little dignity Dorian had left, he turned and faced the people behind him. They all whispered amongst themselves, staring at Dorian as he started to walk away from the stable. He felt like he was back home in Tavinter. He felt like everyone knew his secret.

He killed the Inquisitor's family.

He felt sick.

He wanted to go to the Fade and escape this reality.

Maybe Solis could help him achieve that goal. Or he could go back to Tavinter with his tail between his legs. Whatever it was, it was better than facing the reality that he had killed Ozen's family. As Dorian walked up the steps that lead away from the stables and small markets, he came across Verric who was outside sitting on the bench. His head was back against the stone wall, eyes closed. Dorian prayed he wasn't here to talk to him. He had enough trouble with the voices in his head. Dorian stopped at the top of the steps.

"You doing alright there, Sparkler?"

"I am fine." Dorian lied.

"You realize everyone knows what happened right?"

"So what if they do?"

"You are lucky our beloved Inquisitor doesn't cut your head off."

"Thank you for your wonderful words of wisdom, Dwarf." Dorian rolled his eyes, not wanting to hear anything from him. Dorian made his way into Skyhold and found his way into Ozen's room.