trust issues. | bill kaulitz

6.

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YOUR POV:

i sat in my room, pressing the call button over and over again until he answers, but he never did, it never rung. what if something happened to him? what if they're all hiding something from me? as i sat there with my phone in my hand, pondering about anything and everything, i heard the door open.

"y/n?" i heard a kind voice speak out to me, i sat raised my head to be met by a concerned bill. "you doin' okay?" he asked as he closed the door, sitting next to me. "yeah, i'm fine." i stared at my phone and at all the calls my father missed. bill let out a sigh before he said: "georg told me what's upsetting you, you don't have to hide it from me." bill looked at my phone with a frown while i looked up at him. "it's hard bill, it's hard not hearing from the only person you ever really cared about for so long." i turned off my phone, looking down onto the ground as i felt a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes. "i hate seeing you like this, i really do y/n but i can't keep lying to you." bill said, i managed to look at him, confused at his words. "lying? about what?" i asked.

"your father is dead."

...

his words made my eyes widen, i was shocked at the information but still hoping it was some sort of joke. i let out a nervous chuckle as i asked: "you're kidding, right?" i looked at him with hope in my eyes, praying that this was just some sort of cruel joke.

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BILL'S POV:

her eyes glistened as she looked at me, waiting for an answer. "i'm sorry but it's not a joke." i told her softly. she put her hand over her mouth, covering it to quiet down her sobs, tears were rolling down her cheeks as she didn't keep her eyes off of mine. "y/n.." i spoke gently, i hated seeing people cry, it hurt me even more seeing her cry. she looked down at the ground, still covering her mouth to muffle her sobs as she gripped the bed sheets with her other hand. she closed her eyes tightly, trying so hard to keep quiet and to stop the tears from flowing. i couldn't watch anymore, i had to hold her. i grabbed her by her shoulders, harshly pulling her into my embrace as she relaxed her arms and cried into my shoulder. i wrapped my arms around her tightly, hoping to calm her down. we were in eachother's embrace for almost half an hour, this was the longest i've ever held a woman but i wasn't complaining, i understood how terrible she felt. i just wanted her to feel okay, her cries got quiet and as i was about to let go of her, i heard her whisper against my shoulder: "no.."

"hm?" i sounded as she buried her head deep into my shoulder, "don't let go, please." she pleaded out to me quietly, she was hurting real bad. instead of letting go, i tightened my grip and relaxed once again as i held her gently, i wanted her to know that i was there. after a few moments of silence, she spoke: "bill?"

"yes, y/n?"

"i don't think i can spend the night alone."

...

"can you stay with me?" she spoke softly, she wanted me to spend the night with her? fuck, this was bad but i couldn't just leave her like this, i didn't have the heart to. "of course y/n." i rested my chin on top of her head, sighing. "let's put you to bed, shall we?" i ask, "mhm." she sounded as i felt her head nodding slowly in approval. i let go of her, "you can lay down." she looked up at me as i stood, her eyes sore from crying. she then layed down on her side, still looking at me, waiting for me to lay down with her. i gave her a reassuring smile as i walked to the other side of the bed, laying on my back, staring at the ceiling. suddenly, y/n turned around, crawling closer to me and snuggling up against my body. she rested her hand on my chest as my heartbeat quickened, i didn't like how i was reacting, not one bit. my face was heating up, i felt like i was going to pass out any moment.

what was this feeling?

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