We walked into the loft after a long silent taxi ride. I didn’t get it he stayed even when I pissed him off. All I could think was I must write in my blog about boys how they will never be understood due to the fact that well they were to complicated. The thing is Im starting to debate putting Sean on my shit list because well here he was in my dad’s loft making me pasta because he wanted to. Not because he had to just because he wanted to. Boys they are too complicated for me to figure out.
“Want me to make some cheese bread too?” Sean says interrupting my thoughts on boys
“What?”
“Do-You-Want-Some-Cheese-Bread-Too?” He says slowly like Im an idiot
“Im not stupid.” I roll my eyes
“No but you can be a jerk and act like your better than everyone else I’m just saying.”
“I don’t let people in jerk keeps them away its safe so if you don’t like it no one told you to come to my house and make me dinner.”
“I know but the way to kill a jerk is to show them that there are good people in the world.”
“I’m going to go put on music any request?”
“Something that’s not depressing. “
“I don’t listen to depressing music. The only music that exists in my iPod is the kind that reveals the innermost workings of my heart.” I smile sticking my tongue out at him.
“How do you feel right now? Tell me with music.” He says going to sit on the sofa while dinner is finish up.
I grab my iPod and think hard about this. It can’t be any song I can’t help but smile I know exactly what I am going to put as the song. All of the sudden Start of Something Good by Daughtry comes on. Sean just stares at me and smiles. I wanted to smile back at him and say how on earth could you be smiling at me right now but the buzzer on the oven decided to interrupt my chance.
“Food is done.”
“Yup.”
We set at the table quietly eating our food just looking at each other while the music played on repeat. I just had no words for him. I didn’t know how I felt about Sean not anymore. I mean he was still smexy and god like but there was something different about him. I just wasn’t sure what it was but it made him seem well seem more attainable not like some far off dream.
“I like spending time with you even if you can be aggravating sometimes.” Sean says getting up to put away the food.
“Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why do you like spending time with me?”
“It’s hard to put it into words, Luzy”
“Put into a song.”
“What do you mean?”
“What song makes you think of me?”
“You’re kidding right you’ll laugh at me.”
“Try me.” I smile egging him on.
He reaches into his pocket and pulls out his iPod and plugs it in and smiles at me.
“This is how I feel every summer when I see you.”
All of the sudden I hear Rocking with you by Chris Rene. I can’t help but laugh.
“What?” He smiles
“Really, this is a cute song.”
“Well remember I used to complain about having to babysitting you. I just didn’t want people to know I like you ok especially Jon. Could you imagine?”
“Yeah I can you are ashamed of your feelings.” I shake my head and get up to go to my room.
I feel his hand on my arm. I look at him and want to slap him.
“One more song, Alright?” He says hopefully
“Fine one more, Sean.”
“Until the Last Falling Star By Matthew Perryman Jones. Reminds me of when we were fourteen and I first realized you were more than just Luzy.” He smiled.
I just looked at him. I couldn’t put into words how much I loved that song.
“You ok?”
“Yeah I’m ok.” I look at him and smile.
“So I’m going to kiss you alright.”
“No it’s not Good night Sean.” I say pointing to the door
“Really?’
“You want me it takes more than a couple of okay song choices about your feelings. You have to actually work for me.” I smile
“Night Luz. You will be mine.” He smiles walking to the door.
