ᴄʀᴀᴠᴇ; sᴏɴɢ ᴍɪɴɢɪ

two

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"hey min, i have a question." he pauses his actions to give you his full attention.

"who was that girl that left your dorm while i was headed this way?" his head tilts in confusion as to why you would care about that.

"oh that was just a friend, she visited me for a bit and we caught up." you couldn't tell whether he was lying or not.

"well how come you looked so worn out and disheveled when you opened the door?" you kept pressing the matter and his reaction started to sour.

"i was just tired that's all, you shouldn't worry about who i have over. let's just focus on the situation at hand." you felt a quick pain wash over you as he said that because he's right.

"yeah i guess you're right, but i'm gonna go i'm not really in the mood anymore." you zip up your hoodie and fix yourself.

"y/n you don't have to go." mingi says as you get up and head for the door.

"i'm sorry, my head's all over the place. i think it's best if we just cool it for now." with that you walk out the dorm and head to your own.

mingi sighs and runs his hands through his shoulder length hair. "what changed, what has her acting this way?"

as you walk to your dorm, you're in deep thought about your feelings. "i can't seem to control my feelings around him and that's not how this was supposed to go. my feelings for him should be non existent."

~✩✩✩~

another day, another few classes.

it's been a couple of days since you've hooked up with mingi and you're conflicted. you've been avoiding him in all aspects because you didn't want to talk about what happened.

as you finish your mid day classes you head back to the main dorms where you live. you walked into the lounge and saw it was as it always is; busy with students playing games, conversing and studying. you noticed mingi's fiery hair color from afar and decided to hurry and go up to your dorm before he saw you. what you didn't expect was him talking with that same girl that sparked the conversation. your eyes met his briefly before you rushed up the stairs, ignoring him calling out behind you.

you get to your dorm room and close it quickly behind you.

"y/n open up we need to talk." mingi knocks firmly and you contemplate whether you should open it or not.

when minutes passed by, mingi almost decided to give up until he heard the latch of your door opening. you motioned for him to come in and he does so.

for a couple of moments, there's an awkward silence until he clears his throat.

"what's going on with you, i know you've been avoiding me." he questions, a hint of concern laced into his voice.

"i just needed space." you shift on your bed uncomfortably.

"listen i'm perfectly fine with you needing space but i just want to know why, did i do something?" he leans in and locks eyes with you.

you always found his eyes so mesmerizing. so kind yet mischievous.

"you did nothing wrong mingi." it was true, he had did nothing wrong, you just didn't want to blame yourself.

"then what's wrong y/n, is it because of the girl that was in my dorm that night? he takes it his guess was correct at the way you tensed up.

"do you care about that y/n, truthfully i need to know." his eyes continue to linger on you even as you break eye contact.

"no., yes. i don't know, i know i shouldn't but fuck, i do min. i care so much and that's bothering me! we're just hookup buddies, nothing more but i want more than that, i crave more than that. i want to be around you all the time and you're literally all i think about. i know that's not what we agreed too and i get it if this is the end but i can't hold it in anymore." tears well up in your eyes and frustration builds in your core as you spill your feelings out, afraid of rejection but prepared for it.

he stays silent, taking your words and body language in. he didn't know you felt so strongly about him and didn't know how to react. he moves closer on the bed and engulfs you in a deep hug. you didn't react at first but after a while you gave into his embrace.

"i'm sorry for not realizing you felt this way. i'm very conflicted y/n, what we have now is great and i wouldn't be opposed to exploring more but i'm at a point where i want to be open, i don't want a relationship right now, im sorry."

you sigh deeply at the slight rejection you just received and try to hold in your emotions until after he left.

"oh, i understand. i'd like to be alone please." his heart aches at hearing the heartbreak in your voice.

"if you need me, you know where to find me." and with that he left you alone to your thoughts and defeated emotions.

as soon as you heard the door close you began to sob. you were prepared for this but it still hurt like hell.

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