Loki of Vanaheim (Part 3)

Warrior Loki Returns (LOKI)

I woke with Freyr early the next morning and waited in the formal room of the court hall, where Sigyn and I were married. When not being used for such ceremonies, it was where council was held and laws were passed. Freyr and Hriedmar were used to sitting at the front of the room in positions of authority, but now, they sat amongst the aisles and strengthened each warrior that came to answer the call to fight.

Anxiety pulsing through the halls made us all feel lacking in purpose. We had nothing to do but wait. I busied myself by quizzing any idle man or woman I came across, testing their abilities with incantations and tricks. Some became annoyed with me if I approached them more than once, but it was for their own good. Some flared their fingers when they cast or added strange choreography to their shoulders which made their illusions shiny and impassable. I carefully repositioned them every time like I would my younger students. If I learned anything from Mother, it was how to be a patient teacher.

Regin arrived looking haggard, wide-eyed, and unable to focus. He sat alone at the back of the room and tapped his lips with his hands clutched together. His mind ran in quiet circles that spiraled into visible despair.

I sat beside him as I might've with Thor once, trying to comfort with my presence alone. "Today's the day, isn't it?"

He nodded slowly. We had enough wherewithal to be certain Gorr would appear before moonrise. But something else was troubling the boy.

"What do you fear most, Regin?"

He shook his head and looked away, as if my question offended him. But an uncomfortable minute convinced him to say things out loud to remove them from the forefront of his mind. "I've made so many promises to Idunn. Swore to return. Swore to marry her the moment we had the chance. I fear this was the last morning we'd ever wake together." He picked at his nails absently. "I see her blonde hair when I close my eyes. Hear her voice. Smell her skin."

I chuckled. "This feels familiar. Have you sent her to safety?"

"Aye. She's traveled east with the other families from the city. But now I'm wishing I had kissed her longer. Memorized her face. Kept her with me somehow." He sniffled quietly, though I still noticed. "You aren't painted with fright like everyone else. You don't fear anything, do you?"

"Anything?" I scoffed. "Perhaps I hide my fear effectively. But these people...they're not soldiers. Most Vanir think their best magic is their ability to light a candle or pour wine. I fear for the lack of Asgardian armor and real weapons. Relying on what I've given them is a fool's gamble. I fear what we'll all lose when this is over. Fear alone is not a flaw; it is only when fear becomes cowardice that it taints a man's character."

Regin turned to me with a slight smile. "Thank you."

"For what?" I asked, narrowing my eyes.

"For making me feel less foolish." He reached beneath the table and fussed with the tops of his boots while changing the subject. "When I met you before, you said Idunn would be my greatest companion. What about yours?"

"You mean my wife?"

"Yes. Who is she? What does she think about all this?"

I sighed and clenched my left fist, focusing on the stones of my wedding band. "Sigyn...my Ginny...she's worried I will not come home to her. Our sons are too young to help themselves, but old enough to pester her. She needs me because we sustain one another. But there's something she had to learn about me early on—I have no patience for distraction in battle. A good soldier cannot be halfway between the battlefield and the bedroom. Before you step out to face the enemy, you must choose to see the faces of the men you stand beside. If you only see her face, it might lead to your end."