To My Dear Ex Boyfriend,

So Long And Goodnight

So for months now, I know this is creepy, I've stalked your new girlfriend's Facebook. Trips we never got to take, you took with her. Seriously, Alabama? You and your sister have a strange incest vibe already going on, but you felt the need to travel to Alabama? 

Anyways.

I've been trying to figure out where you moved since you left our old place. Rumor had it that you moved closer to my college, so I was doing everything in my power to avoid you. I didn't want to walk anywhere near the street you lived or drive it if I could help it. However, the photos you posted never showed a house number, leaving me unable to track your location. 

But I was thrilled to learn you moved to Texas with your new girl. I hope you two are living it up down there and never return here again! I hope you burn in the Texas heat and are shot by a stray bullet. No, I'm not being too cruel. Yes, I have actually gotten over you. I'm glad that a considerable chunk of my anxiety is finally gone. 

Now, to deal with your sister. 

The internet is a wonderful thing! Just by pure luck, I've now found her address and discovered that her run-in with the courts is not over yet! You are all nothing but pure vermin raised to be thieves and scammers, so it makes complete sense that your sister is taking our former landlord to case an entire year after moving from the property. Are you guys really that pathetic that you have to blame all your downfalls on others? She was nothing but kind to us, and I'm beyond favorable of her for just letting me out of the lease! Everyone smoked inside, you had a cat despite the no pets rule, she let us rent without any renting history, and she just gave us all a shot after I told her about how you and your sister were desperate to move out. This is how you repay her?! I want to reach out and wish her good luck as your entire family is slime. 

Why is your sister going after the former landlord and the company she owns? Well, if you aren't aware, she fell down the stairs while you were living at the house here in our state. She injured herself and is still suffering to this day, allegedly. I don't believe this story one bit, but I'm not going to judge. I've listened to stories of how your mother and father taught you how to scam the system. Your sister, admittedly, doesn't want to work and has been seeking a way to live off the government for ages now. I guess this is her way of getting disability, claiming she's too injured to work, and going after the poor former landlord. 

Yet here is the thing I find funny. During the Sheriff Sale, the excuse for not being able to appeal the judgment was "K fell down the stairs and broke her ankle and we've had to deal with that". The judgment appeal was needed by the end of May. According to her court documents, she fell in mid-June. Pretty funny, isn't it? Liars til the day you die? 

Your stepmother is oh so happy about the lawsuit! My friend works with her and has told me that she's beaming ear to ear around the office lately. Ironically, since the day the lawsuit was filed. I'm curious to see if your sister actually wins the $50,000+ she's seeking in damages. 

Good luck to you and your girlfriend in Texas and I hope your sister's case is laughed out of court! I hope her new daughter is removed from her care along with your nephew. 

I hope you and your family have the days you deserve.