Sunshine and Lollipops- Solangelo Mortal AU

Chapter 12

Jumping straight to it :)
Will Pov
TW: Mention of Self Harm thoughts/Self Harm scars

I finished doing Nico's page and I turned to him. I peeked at his paper and smiled. He had drawn a cat.

"Really. You don't like cats, of all things?"

He shrugged. "I like dogs better." He looked pensive after this.

I chuckled and shook my head. "You couldn't think of anything better, but the poor cats?"

Nico shook his head. "Nope."

I shook my head again and passed him his worksheet. "Done," I said with an exhale.

He took it and looked it over. He finally nodded. "Thanks. I... Thanks."

I wondered what he was going to say. "No problem. I'm going to sleep now. You joining?"

I realized how weird that sounded about 10 seconds after I said it. I shook my head. "I mean, are you going to sleep too?"

Nico chuckled and nodded. I smiled and stood up. I walked over to my closet and closed the door. I know he probably guessed what I was doing. I walked over to the drawer at the very back of my closet and got a sports bra out. My binder couldn't be worn more than 8 hours, and I'd had it since the morning, like every day.

I got a towel, underwear, and a comfy sweatshirt and sweatpants. After opening the door and stepping over Nico's sprawled form on the floor, I head across the hall to the bathroom.

After undressing, I turn on the shower and get in. At first, I wash my hair in a hurry, and then my body. I get to my boobs. I stare at them, hating the flobs of meat on my chest. No, I didn't dislike them on other people, I'm bi. But I hated them on me.
They seemed so wrong on my body. I sigh and continue down my legs. I get to the old scars on my thighs, put there because I was a coward those many years ago. I still am, but now I'm less selfish. If I died, Mom and Kay would revive me to kill me again ( I can almost imagine Kayla's greeting when I came back up from hell; ' What the fuck were you thinking, you asshat?').

Sometimes I still want to, but... I think it's better not to. No, I won't say I'm completely okay; I still get suicidal thoughts sometimes. but I won't act on them. Mom can't lose another child.

I finish up, and start drying myself off not looking down when I dry off my chest or thighs.

I cross the hall with my dirty clothes and my binder tucked between them. I toss everything except my binder in the hamper and put the binder in the second drawer. I get socks, which I had forgotten, and walk outside.

Nico glances at me as I come out. He looks back to the pages on the floor quickly, but then looks back up again. He looks hesitant to ask me something, so I ask, " What's wrong?"

He shakes his head, " Nothing." 

I sigh loudly and flop down dramatically on my bed. "Tell meee," I whine, looking at him upside down, on my back.

Nico rolls his eyes, "Can you... lend me some clothes? Please."

I nod and smile. "Any specifics?" Then I paused, and after a moment chuckled, "I guess whatever's darkest and creepiest in my closet, huh?"

Nico nods and gives me a ghost of a smile "Thanks."

I go to the closet again and pick out one of my few black shirts and gray sweatpants for Nico. I call out, "Do you need socks too?"

There's a pause, then he shouts back, "Yeah.-"

He stopped abruptly, but I shrugged it off after he didn't continue. I grabbed him my only pair of black socks and strode out. Then I stopped. I forgot my slippers.