Anna

35 - Look At Me

The sad melody came to an abrupt, off-key halt as Chase's head snapped to the side. He stammered and pushed the stool he sat in away from the keyboard. His fear took Ellie by surprise.

"Ellie, I—I'm sorry, I didn't know you were up..."

She scoffed and turned to stomp away. This time, though, he followed her.

"Ellie, wait. Can you please just... Ellie, stop."

She planted her feet on the floor and he jogged in front of her, blocking her exit. A scowl brought on by the irritation of Chase's broken record apologies drew across her face.

Chase couldn't help it, but his height dwarfed her, leaving her to feel like a child.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I was out of line last week."

Ellie glared up at Chase as he towered over her.

"Yeah, you were." She spun on her heels and walked back into the studio, but the room spun with her. She pushed past her lightheadedness and forced herself forward, hoping to put as much distance between the two of them as possible. Her attempt proved futile as Chase followed close behind.

When Ellie stepped through the door, she noticed a crystal glass on the rug. It was empty, save for a few drops of caramel-colored whiskey. The open bottle sat next to it.

Ellie crossed her arms and turned to Chase. Dizziness threatened to topple her, but she held her ground.

"Where are Joe and Tessa," she demanded, rather than asked.

"They had to leave for a few hours."

"So they asked you to babysit?"

Chase sighed and hung his head, clearly frustrated at her disbelief. Or maybe he was embarrassed.

"Look, I wasn't exactly Joe's first choice, either. He didn't want you to be alone."

Ellie used her scowl to tell Chase that she did not care; she would rather be alone. Chase leaned against the doorframe and looked at his feet. His toe tapped against the floor. The middle finger on his left hand made a repetitive snapping motion.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there for you," he said, looking past her. "You deserved better."

Ellie avoided his eyes. She paced the room, hoping he would get the hint. When her gaze fell to the keyboard, Chase's phantom melody filled the silence in her head. She often struggled to grasp the subtleties of what Joe and Chase did. From what she heard, one thing was clear: Chase was hurting.

"Robin left me."

Ellie straightened with a jolt and her forehead wrinkled. At first, she thought she misheard him, but one glance at his sullen expression told her everything she needed to know. "Joe doesn't know yet."

Chase dragged himself to a chair in the opposite corner and sank into it. Ellie's tense shoulders fell when she saw how he slouched, as if he could not keep himself upright. He leaned forward and picked up the whiskey glass. With his elbows on his knees, he swirled around the remaining liquid.

Ellie cocked a suspicious eyebrow. She thought he was going to pull out another excuse, but as she stared at him, she saw how worn down he was. He looked the same way she felt, like they'd both been kicked around a few too many times. Salt-and-pepper stubble grew along his jawline where he was normally clean-shaven. His tired eyes were filled with regret.

"Joe was right," he said. "Lizzie never had anything to do with this. I thought if I talked, I could convince myself that it wasn't my fault she was taken. I never meant to hurt you." Chase sniffled, causing Ellie to drop her guard. Her gaze softened. "I tried to get out of it after your mom died, but I already signed a contract. They threatened to sue us if we backed out. I should have let them. I know what I did was shitty, but I didn't sell or give anything beyond that interview. You have to believe me."