Apocalyptic Love

Moments like this

Laughter and smiles filled the night sky, but under all that was sadness. We found a place where we would be safe, but we lost good people getting here, and parts of ourselves I didn't think we could ever get back. The dead were still out there and worse people, but all we could do is hope; pray we could create some kind of lives for ourselves in all the horror.

"Here's to all of us" Matt held his cup up grinning widely at all of us who were sat around the campfire "To the family we lost" his eyes locked intently into mine, I lost my father and a father figure, but he also lost a brother and as much as he hid it, he was hurting.

Carter was sat a bit further back distancing himself from the group. Moments we'd had since I got back were short and I always found myself craving more, but now I knew we had time. Out on the road you never know what the day will bring and now we can finally take a moment to breathe.

The main building in the centre of the park had toilets and showers than ran off generators, we needed more fuel, but we had enough for a few nights with the site being untouched. I headed towards them not looking back to the crowd, my ankle was still throbbing, but Matt said it just looked like a sprain and I got lucky; he found a thick cane of wood for me to use a support.

Barely making it to the showers I leaned against the cool tiles, biting down on my lip as the pain slowly subsided.

"You okay?" Carter walked into the showers, looking over me as I held back the pain. I nodded, but he leaned back and crossed his arms across his chest "You can barely walk, how are you going to stand in the shower?".

"I'll just have to manage, but thankyou for saving me. Again" I laughed lightly and saw he was smiling too.

"It's nothing" Carter walked closer until he was standing directly in front of me "Come on, I'll help you". I was shocked. The boy could barely stand being around me the past few days and now he was offering to shower me.

I hummed nervously while letting my weight rest against him, his hand slipped around my back as he walked me over to the shower. We were both deadly silent, but not in an uncomfortable manner, more of there's a lot to say but neither of us could do it.

My hands raised above my head as he pulled my grimy t-shirt from over my head, his eyes glued to mine to give me privacy even though my body wasn't a new sight for him. Carter knelt down putting my hands on his shoulders as he dragged my jeans from my body, I was stood in my underwear but still I felt bare.

I hadn't realised he'd done the same until he stood underneath the steaming water with me, we both stayed mute even when he pulled my arms back to his shoulders. I could barely see him under the steam encasing the room, but I felt him, his hands massaging shampoo into my hair as I leant into his touch, him working the soap down my body as I sighed in relief.

The water slowed too soon, and I met his eyes, his hazel senses burning into mine; his lip twitching into a slight smile as he brushed my damp hair from my face. All I wanted was to lean over and press myself against his plump lips, he looked as if he wanted to do the same, but he stopped himself.

Carter walked us back over to the benches, grabbing a towel for us. "Feel's good to be able to shower again" I broke the silence, but all he did was nod while he handed me one of his tee's.

"Shout me if you need me" The boy smiled again before walking into the other room and I was left to my thoughts as I changed into his clothes. A scent of pine wood with a mix of cigarettes entered my nostrils, I felt myself relaxing as his trace surrounded me, it was bliss.

But I couldn't leave it at that. There was so much left unsaid and if I didn't do it know I don't know when I would. Now we were at peace, we had a safe space, but we all knew it might not last. So I limped around the park, desperately searching for him until he was finally in my sights. It was dark, but I could see him sitting on one of the Ferris wheel carts, his feet swaying slightly as the cart was rocked by the harsh winds.

"Can I sit?" Carter looked over silently but held his hand out to help me up. "We can't keep going on like this".

Carter dragged his hands through his overgrown locks as he lent back to look at the dark sky "I know, you don't make it easy you know" he laughed but I could tell he was having a battle in his mind. We both were.

"I tried to give you space you know, but we always seem to end up back together" copying his form, I laid my head back against the cool metal of the cart. The night was almost calming, golden dots scattered across the sky, it was on of them moments where you forget everything else going on in the world and you are just locked in on one moment.

"I was going to run again" Carter turned his head slightly, holding onto each word that left my lips "when we saw Thomas again, but then I thought about everyone. Matt would forgive me for anything I knew that, but I knew if I went I'd lose you forever and I don't think I could handle that".

"You could never lose me Katie; I know I backed away. The two months you were gone I felt lost, it's like I was here but part of me was with you, and I never want to feel like that again. I felt weak" his fingers intertwined with mine "I don't want to lose you again".

"You won't" I squeezed his hand reassuringly "I can't say what's going to happen, but I'm here and I don't plan on going anywhere".

Carter leaned closer, stroking his free hand from the top of my head until he rested just below my chin, his eyes lingering over each detail of my face. When our lips touched it wasn't passionate, it was slow and gentle as if we were savouring each time we connected. His hands slid from my cheek to my neck, running his finger along the small chain still wrapped around my skin and he smiled. "You kept it".

The moment was perfect, gazing at him under the dim moonlight, the way he stared so contently as he held me. "Of course I did".

Edited