Peace

Chapter 16: Universe

Lying is the best suit that Win has ever worn in life. Eating one meal per day is enough for him. He doesn't get rid of everything he eats anymore. It is simply because his energy is always drained at the end of the day and he cannot even stay up past midnight now. When he eats, he makes sure to eat so little, just to ensure he can do works and assignments without headache interfering.

Everyone at university is shocked by his transformation. They do not talk about him anymore, even though they occasionally stare at him as he passes by them. Win can't help but feel satisfied because he is able to shut their mouths once and for all.

Despite all that, he still feels a void within himself. He is far from reaching the circle of peace. All he hears is some echoes ringing in his head. There is never a consistent silence or placid waves crashing against his shore. It is always harsh and loud-the sound of those echoes.

Win glances at the number displayed on the weighing scale. 80 kg on the dot. He breathes out, tears spilling from his eyes. The shower in the bathroom stops running. The man quickly hides the device under the bed and wipes his tears. He gets on the bed and covers himself with the duvet. A moment later, Bright comes out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist.

The older man heads over to the closet to search for something to wear for sleep. He finds a pair of maroon pajamas that Win bought him about a month ago. He puts it on and rushes to their bed. Win is staring at the white ceiling above, not blinking. "Prince?" Bright sits on the bed next to him. He leans his back against the headboard.

"Yeah?" Win looks at his boyfriend with a small smile on his face. "Hey, you're wearing the pajamas!" he says enthusiastically while playing with the pocket of the top located near Bright's chest.

A small chuckle escapes Bright. "They're comfortable. That's why you love them, chai mai?"

Win hums. "I'll buy other colors for you next time."

"Prince?"

"Yes, babe," Win lies on his side, facing Bright now.

"I feel like you're so far away from me."

Win snaps his head up at Bright upon hearing the statement. He doesn't know if he means it literally or the opposite. His heart sinks a bit, and it twists violently in his chest. The younger man moves closer to his boyfriend and places his head on his shoulder. He rests his arm across Bright's chest, hugging him. "Now, I'm close to you," he whispers.

Bright curls his arms around Win, holding him securely. "You're getting smaller. I guess you've been working hard at the gym," he kisses on top of Win's head, inhaling his sweet scent. Win's cheeks are not as chubby as before. His jawlines are showing and they are prominent. His weight definitely has reduced a lot. Nevertheless, he is still the same Win that has been bothering him since day one-in a good way, of course.

Walking down the memory lane, he is taken back to the first time Win said 'I love you' to him. It was the best night of his life. No one has ever said those three words to him, not even his parents. The way Win articulates each word to him is like when the river flows, whispering its wisdom on quiet days or on stormy days. It has an exceptionally soothing effect on him. But then again, he never knows how to say those words back to Win. He doesn't deserve him.

Fifteen-year-old Bright entered the house with a small box of cake in his hand. He was so exhausted because of his part-time job after school. He had no time to complain because if he didn't work, their family won't have food to put on the table. Today was his father's birthday. He decided to surprise him with a cheap cake since he could not afford to buy him a gift.

The house was eerily quiet. He placed the box on the table and searched for a lighter to light up the candles. Once he found it, he hurried back to the living room to find that his father was back at home, holding a bottle in his hand. The man was staring at the box of cake on the table. Bright grinned sheepishly because he couldn't hide the cake in time. "Dad, happy birthday. I love you, dad," he told him.