ʙᴇʜɪɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴜʀᴛᴀɪɴꜱ| ateez

✭𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑 ✭

✭𝐖𝐎𝐎𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐆✭

Two days have drifted by since Jihoon stepped out of my life, embarking on different paths that diverged our futures-and our friendship. The truth weaves a complex web; neither San nor his brother ever stirred emotions within me quite like Jihoon did. Our talks, laughter, even our tears, they all bore significance, yet Jihoon invariably held a pedestal above all.

Each of these men shone brightly in their respective ways, yet Jihoon was my first love, an entity unto himself, unforgettable and irreplaceable. It's unchangeable, this truth, yet equally heartbreaking. I find myself muzzling my true feelings, tucking them away in a quiet corner of my heart, just to see him chase his dreams uninhibited. He deserves the world, and I stand prepared to sacrifice my desires to see him grasp it.

For two more days, he remains in Seoul, consistently attempting to weave our paths together once more over a simple coffee. But I can't bring myself to gaze into his eyes without an ocean of emotions breaking its dam within me.

Underneath a pile of clothes, my fingers traced the edges of a hidden frame. As I unveiled it, the picture revealed two young men, their smiles genuine, eyes reflecting a love that was once pure and untainted. Those days with Jihoon... Had I been fooling myself all those years? Trying to fill the void with San's brother after Jihoon left? While it was a beautiful relationship in its own right, an attempt at moving forward, the essence was never the same.

I inhaled deeply, gathering my composure as I left the sanctuary of the bedroom. Every step felt heavy, echoing memories of the past. Reaching the kitchen, I set down my cup with a gentle clink on the cool marble counter. The morning sunlight streamed through the window, casting a golden hue on everything, making even the mundane shimmer. The aroma of freshly brewed coffee enveloped the room, a comforting reminder of routine amidst the chaos of emotions.

I was about to lose myself in a comforting memory of simpler times when the distinct buzz of my phone jolted me back to reality. I reached out hesitantly, wondering who it could be. Perhaps it was time for new messages, new memories, and maybe, just maybe, a new chapter.

Glancing down, Jihoon's name illuminated the screen, causing my heart to skip a beat. A whirlwind of emotions - from surprise to anxiety - surged within me. I carefully picked up the phone, its weight seemingly multiplied by the gravity of the situation. My fingers hesitated for a heartbeat longer over the notification, the seconds stretching into what felt like hours.

Endless possibilities flashed in my mind. Could he have decided to leave Seoul earlier than he mentioned? Yet the Jihoon I knew valued our shared moments and the bond we once had. Surely, he wouldn't depart without a proper send-off, without one last look or word?

The air in the kitchen grew thick, the sounds outside fading into insignificance. I mustered the courage, my thumb pressing down on the message. As the words loaded, I took a deep breath, bracing myself for whatever revelation awaited.

"I know you don't want anything to do with me anymore, that's why we won't be meeting to say goodbye. I'm leaving early in an hour. Take care of yourself, love you, nerd." His message was succinct, yet each word seemed to carry a universe of unspoken emotions.

I stood there, phone in hand, his words enveloping me like a fog, dense and impenetrable. "Love you, nerd" - those words, playful yet sincere, lingered in the silence of the room, reverberating in the spaces where our laughter once resided.