Passing Trains

Tell Me do you Hate Me or do you Want to Date Me?

James' POV:

As we walked out back into the theater, I glanced at Trey, giving a "don't say anything ' face. The rest of the class went by quickly but with every Jack and Davey scene, it made everything more awkward than it already was. Was I crushing? Or was it just a feeling that I needed love and affection from someone. I needed love, touch, and attention in my life. But was it worth it by getting it from Trey? Whatever. Once I got home I checked my phone, looking if Trey had said anything. He hasn't. I sighed and sat on my bed, putting my hands over my face, remembering the feeling of his lips against mine. God, I wanted them against mine again. A ping from my phone interrupted my thoughts. It was the group chat. Lauren had texted an invite to an audition after party as she called it. Lauren was known for rager parties (Often with alcohol). A bunch of responses flooded in, a lot of "OMG YES!" pinged my phone. I responded a swift sure. A wave of regret flooded over me when I saw Trey's name pop up with the answer of sure. Just like me. I had a few days to stall since the party was on saturday. It couldn't ruin my friendship with him. I won't let it.

The clock ticked to midnight. There's school tomorrow. Normally that would be my escape but that asshole has to plague my mind there as well. I skip my shower and just roll over in my sheets. The fabric clinging to my back from the sweat. I felt gross, but I couldn't bother to leave the escape I built for myself in my bed. Phone on DND brain on DND it was perfect.

Until I woke up. My head pounded, a similar sensation to a hangover. The issue is I was stone cold sober yesterday. I slugged out of bed grabbing my change of clothes off the arm of my desk chair and walked to the bathroom. I stood stone face in front of the mirror staring at myself until I looked weird. I splashed water on my face and grabbed a towel out of the cupboard. I turned the shower on and inhaled the steam of the burning hot shower that I didn't have the energy to change the temperature of. The water burned my skin and hopefully my horrid thoughts with it. I ditch the towel I brought out and put on my new clean clothes that immediately change to a darker shade with the water. I throw my soaking hair into a had and hope for the best. I check my phone, I still have 3 hours before school? 3 hours without distraction. I walk down stairs almost tripping down the steps about 4 times. My mom was not up yet, I Just slouched on the couch and put in my air pods. My head lolls back in disgust with my brain. Time moves unbearably slow, I see the time click to 4:44. I open my phone and go to the Group chat and type out 444! And send it just for fun. No one should be up at this point. Except someone was. The worst person possible to respond to me. Trey likes the message. He likes the message? I feel my whole body close up. It feels like I can't breathe. I yank off my necklace in hopes of an airway.I tug at my hair to give my head more space to get oxygen up there. Yet my brain seems to have all the air in the world to spout so many thoughts, lies I hope. My head spins. My thoughts get louder and louder and yet I could still hear the smallest footsteps of my mother coming down the stairs. But- my mom wakes up well after I leave for school. 7:35. Fuck. I ran to grab my shoes and backpack and ran out the door. I sprint to the street. I really have to get a car. I run as fast as I can through the school gates. Into the office I grab a tardy pass and run to class. I swing the door open a little too hard before adjusting to my normal school behavior. Calm and nice. I swifty take my seat. At least it's only french class. Who made me have to speak another language at 7 in the morning? I daydream the whole class. I try to focus but give up inevitably. Finally the bell rings.

Trey's POV:

I stand up from my desk and walk sluggish to my next class. First period always goes super fast for me. English was next, I ust transferred classes due to a change in electives it fucked up my schedule. The class is unnecessarily bright. It floods my eyes, blinding me slightly. I just stand awkwardly next to the teachers desk not knowing where to sit. The rest of the class floods in. The teacher walked up to me.