Tides Of Bones

4. THE JOURNAL (Picture of Dearon)

It is in his chambers that he remembers his Mother's journal is in his waistband.

How he loathed her. She had stolen his sister away from him and now it was too late. Soon he would be utterly alone, in a castle full of memories and sin. He goes to toss it in the basket for trash but hesitates. Perhaps the journal had information meant for him or his sister? What if she wrote of secret spots where she kept jewels or money? Things that could help his Kingdom. Surely he could see past his hatred of her if it meant helping his people.

He groans and plops onto the bed, suddenly bone tired. Opening the journal he is intrigued to find that it dates farther back than his birth. His Mother's family was blessed by the Gods all the years before, but somewhere along the way the Throne was decided to be ruled only by King. So when a female was born and no male, her father had arranged the marriage to who he deemed respectable bloodline.

Her handwriting is neat, with clean lines of cursive. Cursive was a lost type of lettering in these times but his Mother had been sure to teach him when he was young. But perhaps most interesting, the language was one very rarely used now: Greek. Compared to their own tongue, Greek was complex and meant only for scholars. After the Great War, the Kingdom thought it wise to create a new language, to ensure secrecy. They stopped using Greek long ago, he had no idea his Mother spoke it, but now he understands why it was always part of his studies, from his Mother's request no doubt.

She must have used the language to prevent his father, who only knew their tongue, from having access to her private thoughts. Something he is also surprised by. While there was no love shared between his parents, he cannot remember a time they ever hugged or held hands, they also held no secrets. They believe honesty between them was the best way to rule. They were a team, regardless of emotions felt between them.

He is flipping through her memories of lessons and tips her mother had given to her for ruling. She had to have been seventeen when this journal was started, because his mother often notes how closer her coronation day is. He finds it quite boring, that is until he spots something peculiar: a name he does not know nor that is mentioned in the beginning of the journal. Akikazu, at first he thinks it a place but then he soon sees it's a man.

One whom his Mother loved. A traveler she met when her father was King.

It is with great wonder how I became so infatuated with Akikazu. I have now known him for three full winter season, and I wish nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with him. He claims he must be on his way soon; he cannot stay in the same place for long, but that he wishes I come with him. Is it wrong that I have been considering the impossible? To live for love?

He reads through some other entries, stopping to read how his Mother plans to sneak away, how she believes there is no reason for to stay, since she does not love the man her father arranges her to be wed to and how her people do not need her, not when she was a female with no power.

I have met the boy Father wishes me to marry. He was not what I expected. His portrait portrayed a stiff man, one whom had a dark stare. But he was quite nice, a gentleman. He even made me laugh.

Skipping to the final chunk of pages, he reads how she fell for both men, how his Father had plans for her to be just as part of the Throne as he.

He does not wish failure on me. Unlike Aki, he has high expectations for me. He does not wish me to be anything but who I am. He is not trying to change me. My heart belongs to Akikazu, but he treats me as though I am fragile, delicate. That I need to be protected.

His heart skips a beat at the next page.

I am with child. I have not bled for awhile and today I fainted; my maid says I have not been getting enough food.

I do not know to whom the child belongs to, Sir Cilophor or Akikazu. I shall send word to Aki tonight; he wishes to leave within the next handful of days.

Cyrus sits up, the roaring of blood in his ears. His Mother continued her affair long after meeting his Father.

The King may not have been his blood at all.

He thinks back to his childhood, how there were always remarks about him and his sister looking like his Mother, but never his father. It was their pale skin that had always been in question, since his parents both shared sun kissed tones.

He rings the bell next to his bed and a maid comes. "Wake Sir Roscloth, I request his audience."

"Yes, your Highness," she bows and leaves.

Cyrus continues to read.

I have received word from Aki. He says we must meet, for the sake of the child. He has something he needs to tell me. If we I do not meet him at the caves of Dandusser he will come here. It is important, he says. But I wonder if he just wants to change my mind. I told him I had to stay; it was an unrealistic dream to run off with him. Now, for the sake of my child, I need a home, stability. And I have a Kingdom to rule.

His Mother never went to the caves, but she writes she is fearful something bad happened to him, because he never showed like he promised.

Cyrus puts down the journal, questions swirling around his head.

His Mother had lied. She had lied to their Father, to her children, to her people.

She had lied, and he was about to bear the consequences.