𝐔𝐒 - 𝐓𝐚𝐞𝐡𝐚𝐧/ 𝐆𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐳 𝐎𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐬

Butterfly

Leehan sobbed silently looking down at the guy sleeping on his lap, having a knife some inches away from his hand. He was thankful that he entered older's room on time, he must've hurt himself again. "Taesan" He mumbled looking down, at the guy who was peacefully sleeping. "I love you, I love you so much" He whispered pecking on his forehead.

He knew that older had a bad day, and he wanted to distract him as much as he can, he can't help but cry whenever he sees his love being messed up, he hates himself sometimes cuz he can't help him with it, he hates the time older hurts himself when Leehan isn't near him. Leehan knows that he has the ability to calm him and he wants to try his best.

Taesan slowly opened his eyes, Leehan quickly wiped his tears smiling at older. The older smiled at him closing his eyes again. Leehan slowly carcassed his hair as the older looked at him opening one of his eye. "I love you, Leehan" He said and Leehan smiled trying to push back the tears that were threatening to fall. "I love you more" Leehan said leaning down to kiss the older.

"Thank you for being there for me" Taesan said as he hugged his waist, pulling him closer to him. "You don't have to thank me love" Leehan smiled looking at him snuggling his head on his stomach. "It tickles" Leehan said when his face touched his stomach. "I'm sorry" Taesan said smiling sweetly at him. "It's okay, love" He said and smiled. "Do you want to eat something?" Leehan asked and Taesan shook his head. "I'm not hungry" He said sitting up, still clinging onto Leehan.

"Love" Leehan sweetly said looking at older who looked at him quickly. "Let's cuddle" He said smiling and the older smiled widely, nodding like a puppy. "Yay" He exclaimed happily hugging him tightly. "I love you Leehan" Taesan said pecking his cheeks as they both went towards the bed. Leehan hugged him tightly, always scared of losing him. Taesan sighed happily when he felt his arms held him close, he felt safe in this arms, he felt no one can hurt him when he's with Leehan. He trusted and loved Leehan more than anything else and the younger was aware of it.

They drifted into sleep without caring about the time. Well, it was weekend so they didn't have much things to worry about.

Leehan woke up in a middle of the night, looking down at his lover, who was still sleeping in his arms. He smiled seeing the older sleeping calmly, he looked at his hand, slowly pulling the sleeves up, to see his beautiful wrist covered in scars. He kissed them, covering them again and helding the older tightly in his arms.

He knew it was hard for older to stop himself when he was addicted to hurting himself. Leehan hated that he has other responsibilities to take care of, he really just wanted to be with the older every time. It hurted to see the one he loved the most in pain, it broke him everyday, knowing what the older was going through.

💔

"Leehan, the sky is looking so pretty" Taesan said keeping his head on his shoulder. Leehan looked at him admiring the stars and moon in the night sky. "Yeah It's pretty" Leehan said smiling at him. "Leehan, If i disappear, find me in the sky" Taesan said looking at Leehan who nodded, his eyes fixed on the sky. He knew if he looked at the older, he'll break into tears. He wasn't strong enough to love him, but he can't just stop loving him. "I am sorry love" Taesan said when he saw tears in his eyes. "It's okay" Leehan said hugging his waist, pulling him closer. "I love you" Leehan smiled at his lover and kissed him.

💔

"Leehan We have to visit your grandma, Grandpa died and now she have no onee" His mom said calmly. "I can't come" Leehan shook his head looking at his mom who sighed. "Leehan, I'm not asking you, You've to come and you got no other option" His mom said raising her voice. "Mom, I can't come. I've to stay here" Leehan fought back, trying to explain his mom. "Why?" His mom asked looking at Leehan who looked down. "I can't leave Taesan alone" He said looking at her who signed. "You're ditching your family for a friend?" His mom asked being done with her son. "He's not my friend, I love him" Leehan raised his voice, tears falling from his face. He knew his parents will never accept him if he said he loves a guy but for him, Taesan was more important than anyone in the world.

"You're coming with us and it's decided" His mom firmly said and Leehan cried more. He can't leave older alone even for a day. "Mom please" He said trying to beg but she shook his head. "Leehan, You can't love a guy, You'll stay with grandma until I tell you to" She said being mad. "Mom, Taesan needs me-" Leehan sighed when his mother left locking the door of his room. He cried falling on his knees.

In evening, He left the city along with his parents. His father took his phone away, after knowing he loved a guy. Leehan sat there feeling numb.

💔

"Grandma, Can i use your phone?" Leehan said to her grandma when his parents left him there alone with his grandma. He was grateful that his grandma was sweet, unlike his parents. "Sure dear" She said handing him the cellphone. It's been two weeks since he haven't met or talked with Taesan and he was scared, so scared.

He dialed the number, but no one picked up. His hands started to shiver when he dialed for the fourth time. "hello?" He heard a sound from the line. His tears flowing down. "Hello, It's me Leehan" He said, his voice weak. "Hello, I'm James, from Seoul police station. We found this phone at the place a guy committed suicide. Do you know the guy named 'Han Taesan'?" Leehan fall on his knees, the phone falling from his hand. "What's wrong Leehan? Leehan?" His grandma ran towards him, grabbing his shoulders.

Leehan felt numb, his heart broke into millions of pieces. He felt a clutch on his chest, and he couldn't breath. His grandma kept rubbing his back which helped him to breath. Leehan looked at his grandma who looked at him, being so worried. "What's wrong Leehan?" She asked and Leehan looked down. "he committed suicide" Leehan mumbled under his breath. "who?" She asked crouching infront of him. "m-my lover" He said looking at her, his tears falling down. She hugged her tightly, being shocked hearing that. She picked up the phone when he heard someone speaking. "Hello?" She said and the line replied. "ah, you finally picked up the call, If you know him, can you please come to the BND hospital. He is gaining conscious" His grandma widen his eyes looking at Leehan. "Leehan, He's alive" She said, tears falling from her eyes. "He's admited in the hospital, Just go and save him" Leehan frozen on his spot taking the phone away from her hand.

"Hello Officer?" He said and the officer sighed. "Do you know the guy named 'Han Taesan'?" The officer asked and Leehan nodded. "Yes, I know" "Can you visit him at BND hospital? He's gaining conscious" Leehan nodded even knowing the officer can't see that. "Yes, I'll come soon, Please take care of him. Thank you thank you so much Officer" He said and the call got disconnected.

"Grandma, I've to go" He said looking at her with pleading eyes. "I know, Just go and save your love! Take care of him and always be happy together" she smiled, wiping tears off his face. "Thank you Grandma" He quickly hugged him and left.

Will you stay by my side?
Will you promise me?
If i let go of you
You'll fly away
And I'm scared, scared, scared