I Loved You

Chapter 1 From London to Reading

'We are now approaching... Reading!...Change here for the RailAir coach link to Heathrow Airport...' As the GWR train gradually slowed down, what Yilan Han could see was a big board saying 'Welcome to Reading', as well as a station with trains from different railway companies waiting. 'So, this is Reading.' Yilan said to herself, noticing most people on the train have already left their seats and started to line up in the hallway. A subtle smile climbed onto her lip, and it was until most people have left the train when Yilan stood up and got ready to explore the town, the place where she was hoping to live for a long time.

This was the beginning of Yilan's third year in the UK. She spent the first year pursuing her master degree in pharmacy at University College London, and succeeded in getting a job in a pharmaceutical company there. As a new grad without any working experience in the UK, it was very lucky of Yilan to be able to settle down in London, although the salary was not enough to cover her daily living expenses. Her father has paid for all her spendings during her master programme, and has volunteered to support her even after she started her career, but as a sensitive young woman, Yilan clearly knew that she could not take her father's money for granted, as she was not sure about her father's girlfriend's attitude towards that.

In fact, as the only child in the family, Yilan was supposed to return to her hometown Qianchuan, a medium sized city in Southeastern China, after getting her master degree. With her father being a professor in the College of Chemical Engnieering, Qianchuan University, and her father's girlfriend being the Executive Vice Dean in the same college and having lots of networking resources in the College of Pharmaceutical Sciences, it would not be difficult for them to arrange a well-paid job for Yilan in Qianchuan University, where she could live with her father and get picked up every day from work to home, just like her former colleague. But she could not. After Yilan's parents got divorced six years ago, and her father entered a new relationship with his colleague three years ago, Yilan never felt the meaning of the word 'family' would be the same for her. She still has a family, or two families, one from her father's side and one from her mother's side, but those families are not the same ones where the lovely memories have been written, the laughter has been recorded, the gifts have been given with much love and care. Yilan would rather stay in a foreign country, immersing herself into the endless work, using a second language to deal with everything in her daily life, than go back to Qianchuan, facing a broken family directly. She has put hope on London, looking forward to being loved again in this mega city; perharps, just somewhere in the crowds, there is someone waiting for her all these years long.

But London has failed Yilan. After the freshman's curiosity and enthusiasm, Yilan found out that London is not a city that she has imagined. Yes, you may be able to work in the centre of the city, dressing up smartly and talking to people professionally, as if you are achieving your dream, but when the night comes, you could only go back to a small room in a shared flat, waiting for your turn to use the bathroom, and sitting on the bed alone, waiting for the arrival of the dawn meaninglessly. That is not the life that Yilan has expected. After struggling for several months, she managed to find a role of Junior Research Scientist at the famous pharmaceutical company Berks & Berks, which required her to relocate to Reading. Walking out from Reading Station, Yilan went directly to her new home, a newly furnished flat in the town centre, within 5-minute walk to the station.

'Surely, the new journey would start from there.' Yilan said to herself. And so it does.