Love & Scars

24. I Love You

There were only two weeks of school left, and Izzie finished her last exam yesterday. She was coming back from the Slytherin common room when she saw Sirius running down the corridor. Her heart involuntarily skipped a beat at the sight of him before he disappeared into an alcove.

She rolled her eyes as she heard Filch's voice talking to his cat a little further away. She sauntered over to the alcove and slipped in. The alcove was small, so Sirius stood only half a meter away from her.

"Fancy meeting you here." She said coolly, but had to fight her grin as Sirius looked stunned to see her.

"Izzie." He breathed.

"That's my name." She chirped. "So, what did you do now?" She raised an eyebrow at him.

"I didn't do any—" He started defensively, but she stepped forward and clasped her hand over his mouth. Their chests were touching, and she could feel Sirius's fast heartbeat against her, his eyes wide as he looked at her.

"We'll find him, Mrs Norris." Filch's voice came by. "Then Black will regret ever messing with us again. Let's gather up the chains." He murmured further to his cat as his voice drifted away. 

She looked back at Sirius and released her hand over his mouth when the sound of his footsteps receded.

"I don't think he's happy with you." She stepped back.

Sirius stretched his arms and placed them behind his head as he leaned against the wall. Trying to act casual, but his heart was still racing, and his breathing was heavy. "When is he?" He smirked.

"You got a point." She smiled faintly and looked down at her feet. Silence stretched on between them. Then they spoke up at the same time. "Sirius, —"

"Izzie, I —" They looked at each other in surprise. "You go first," Sirius said as he rubbed his neck.

"Right." She nodded with a slight frown. She looked back down at her feet. "I wanted to apologise for what I did at my birthday party. I should never have thrown myself at you. I wanted to say that, that morning —"

"Izzie." Sirius's gentle voice guided her head back towards him. He had stepped closer, right in front of her, and he tentatively cupped her cheek. "You have nothing to apologise for. I'm the one who should apologise."

She turned her head out of his hand. Oh, his hand is so soft and warm. "You shouldn't, not really. It's not like we were together or something. Yeah, you lied and told me you weren't that guy anymore. But we're friends, and you just don't see me that way." She looked back at Sirius; his eyes held so many different emotions. "That's okay, I have Barty now." His jaw twitched.

"No." He shook his head and grabbed her cheeks. "I am so, so sorry for what I did. I was so plastered I don't even remember the rest of the night after you were gone. And we did have something; I hope we still do. And it was progressing slowly, which was the best for both of us, and then I royally screwed things up."

"Yes, you're my friend, but I want more than that, so much more. I can't go a day without seeing you. I can't go a night without dreaming about you. You are constantly on my mind, Izzie. You occupy every thought of mine. That's why I didn't want to do that with you, because I want more than just sex. I wouldn't be able to be fuckbuddies with you or just a one-timer and then back to friends. I want you, all of you, all the time." He took a deep breath. "I love you, Izzie."

It felt like she was holding her breath the whole time he was speaking. Every sentence made her insides flop, or butterflies soar. She breathed out softly when her lungs couldn't take it anymore. 

"What?" She asked breathlessly.

"I love you. I've been in love with you since I danced with you on New Year's Eve. And I realised it when you played the Ukulele for me. I. Love. You." His grey, stormy eyes were fixed on hers, and she felt like he was gazing into her soul. The thumbs resting on her cheeks moved in slow circles. Now it looked like he was the one holding his breath. "Please say something."