Teddy, present
EARLY MORNING SUN FILTERED THROUGH THE TREES creating an ethereal feel to the wooded trail. I missed my usual walking companions, but after the awkward way the night ended last night on the tailgate of Jensen's truck, I didn't want to invite him and Scout.
Instead, I trudge along the brown path alone, trying to force my attention on my surroundings, noting all the minute seasonal changes. The budding leaves and sprouts of grass peeking through the ground couldn't compete with the events of last night, though.
My thoughts keep wandering back to Jensen's hands gripping my face and the feather-light touch of his lips against mine. I have replayed that scene about a million times, trying to deduce exactly what made him kiss me and then immediately take it back.
The hardest part to reconcile is how quick he was to backtrack, like the kiss was an accident, not worth the mention.
"Shit, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that."
How do you not mean to kiss someone? Sure, it was barely a kiss, the soft way his lips brushed over mine. They hardly made contact before they were swept away. Maybe he had merely been caught up in the moment. We'd just named our dog and the moment felt big.
Our dog.
We have a dog together. Well, that's how we phrased it, but really it's his dog. He's the one who takes care of Scout. Things were shifting lately, though. We were almost starting to feel like our own little mini family. Me, Jensen and Scout. But the reality is, I just pop in like an outsider from time to time.
When I become too annoyed by my own train of thoughts, I pick up my pace until I am racing along the path, trying to drown out the noise in my head.
The way he tugged on the sleeve of my shirt—his shirt—and said, "Nice shirt." The way he had hauled me into the house when he saw the blood on my arm. The way he cleaned up the scrape on my arm and blew on my skin. The feeling of him standing between my legs and the way he leaned into me as he stared at my lips.
"Ahhhhh!" I take my frustration out on the path, demanding my legs to pick up the pace, to outrun the frustration and confusion that pumped through my veins. All Jensen's mixed signals were messing with me. How he could be so sweet and flirty one minute and then grumpy and standoffish the next?
It felt too familiar. It felt like the morning after the infamous New Year's Eve, and all the subsequent months that came after.
"Fuck, Teddy. Your tits are my new favorite thing."
How could he go from rubbing his hard dick against me and proclaiming my boobs to be his favorite thing one minute to completely blowing me off the next?
When I nearly trip over a stick on the path, I slow my pace to a jog, my breaths ragged. I run until the path dumps me out at the edge of town. I walk along the sidewalk that will bring me back into the heart of Lake Hope.
The further into town I get, the more signs of life I see. A man raking up the dead leaves uncovered from the snow. Two small kids kneeling on their driveway, a bucket of chalk dumped out between them. A group of teenagers playing a game of basketball. A woman bending over to scroop up poop into a plastic baggie, her dog stretching the leash taut to sniff the base of a tree.
Ducking my head, I attempt to appear igcognito. I don't want to run into anyone I know. I'm in no mood to hold a conversation.
When I make it back home with only a few waves tossed at people, I let myself in and walk directly to my bathroom, stripping out of my sweaty clothes and stepping into the warm spray.
YOU ARE READING
Starting With You
Romance"You're supposed to be my best friend, but all I can think about is kissing you again." TEDDY: I somehow got stuck in the unfortunate "one of the guys" category. It was on accident, naturally falling into this role since my childhood best friend was...
