I Spent the Night with Hawks (READERxHAWKS)

No Place in Reality

the nurse handed me a small paper cup of water for me to sip while the doctor took my blood pressure and looked worriedly at my chart. she sighed heavily before talking to the nurse in hushed whispers before turning to me.

"you're 15 pounds lighter than you were at your last check-up. that's not good. if you want your little nugget to be healthy you'll have to put on weight. "

Panic hit me hard my hands flying to my stomach and at that moment I realized I'd do just about anything to keep this baby! Sora must have read the look on my face and sighed deeply patting my shoulder.

"we'll make sure she eats from now on anything else?"

"your corticosterone levels are high, indicating stress but we also see this a lot in women who are pregnant with heteromorph children. does the father have a heteromorph quirk?"

I winced. My mouth opened and closed and I could feel my lungs squeezing in my chest. my hands squeezed my leggings in my fist. things were blurry and it took me a moment to realize my eyes were clouded with tears. sora came through again answering with:

"He is, he has wings. Will the baby, do you think?"

"most probably, we'll have to keep an eye on both of them. hedoromorphs present a unique challenge to childbirth and each one comes with its risks and obstacles. well, have to play it by ear."

I zoned out, my mind running a mile a minute. should I try telling Keigo? I'm sure he doesn't want to see me, but does that mean he wouldn't want to know? does he even deserve to know? we were in the car driving to Mos when I came back to myself.

"we might have to tell him"

"we'll discuss this at Mo's. we'll need the whole family for this don't you think?"

Soras was the sole voice of reason, a drastic contrast to normal.

~

"Well first off, you have a great job so you're financially stable. you have a support system in Mo and I so you can raise the baby on your own if you choose to."

Sora's voice echoed out reasonably and calmly in the closed restaurant as we all sat down to eat the dinner Mo cooked for us.

"I still think Hawks deserves to know. he's an asshole for leaving but that doesn't mean we shouldn't at least do him the courtesy of telling him he's gonna be a dad"

"He left her in a hotel i think he deserves the garbage heap or the bottom of my boot!"

"We don't have to even say more than 'hey she's pregnant' just to let him know"

"for what purpose? he's just gonna fu-"

"I'll tell him if I can!"

my voice cut across whatever snide comment Sora was about to say to Mo. Her mouth hung open comicly while she looked wide-eyed at me and Mo looked very pleased, smug almost.

"I'll go talk to him if he'll even see me,"

I said it again less to tell them and more to steel my resolve.

~

I was shaking I was so nervous. sweat dripped down my spine and I was shaking. I think I'm gonna vomit and not from morning sickness. we all decided that it would be best to go the next day to tell Hawks. Mo put his foot down and informed us that he would be going with us, going so far as to close his restaurant early. Sora took the day off of work at the paper saying this was a better story than the piece she was working on about recycling.

so shaking I walked into the lobby of Hakws agency. it was a tall building made of glass and slanted windows. the interior was welcoming, there were red plush couches in a waiting area and a beautiful receptionist sitting at the wooden front desk. the walls were covered in pictures of the tops of skyscrapers and sunsets, clouds, and cityscapes at night.

The receptionist looked friendly enough at first glance but that could be deceiving. I turned around heading for the exit suddenly. sure this was a terrible horrible idea and we should never have come Mo grabbed me and turned me back around. practically picking me up and putting me back into play.

"Mo! What if he doesn't recognize me"

"then ill kick his ass and he can go burn in hell!"

Sora growled out, her eyes practically on fire with the desire to bring down the hammer.

"even if it doesn't work out, we're still here for you flower!"

Mo reassured in a near whisper. we walked up to the pretty receptionist in a beautiful sundress. her baby blue hair pulled up in an attractive messy bun.

"excuse me but we're here to speak with Hawks"

she smiled politely but I could tell it was forced. it never reached her eyes. She looked us all up and down her lips curling up slightly in disgust.

"do you have an appointment?"

"no, but could you just ask if he'd like to speak to a Y/N L/N?"

she opened her mouth to argue but then seemed to think better of it after getting a good look at Sora, her expression said she'd fight god. sighing heavily, she nodded. She picked the phone up dialed a number and spoke briefly into it before placing it back down.

"I'm Sorry but I was told we have no business with a miss Y/N L/N"

"what do you mean!?"

"I'm sorry but I'm only relaying what I was told from above."

"Call him again!"

"sora- Maybe we should go!"

"but we've come all this way! you want him to know!"

"I'll find a different way then!"

I whispered, tugging on her arm lightly. my eyes stung and I could hardly see they were so blurry but I refused to openly sob until we were on the street and Mo was holding me.

~

I hid in the alleyway across from the agency, watching as her friend held her up and walked her down the street while she sobbed on their shoulders. She looked gaunt and pale. She looked like she would have been happier if I'd never intruded on her life. my receptionist called me while I was leaving the league's HQ to tell me Y/N was at the agency. I blew it off as her being a crazed fan, I knew Skeptic was listening.

my sole consolation was that she was safe. even if I had hurt her irrevocably, maybe now she'll give up on me, maybe being away from me is the best thing for her. it's not like I could offer her a great life anyway. A hero husband who's also an assassin and spy for the commission, yeah Keigo, a real winner!

Wait when did I start dreaming of a life with her? me and her with a couple of cute baby birds in my penthouse. the one I made sure even the commission doesn't know about. the one that's a secret I can't go to often. I could so easily picture a life with her. she'd write articles and I'd keep being a hero. we'd come home to each other, laughing and telling each other about our days while we cuddled up together eating takeout because neither of us could bother cooking.

A cute little round face with her eyes and hair color and my wings and eye markings. giggling and squealing as I teach them to fly with their cute little baby wings.

but they're just ridiculous dreams and they have no place in reality

Dear readers, if there are any. (I'm doubtful)

I need help. should the baby be a boy or a girl? I could go either way at this point. 

~ Sincerely, the exhausted Author.