Romeo and Juliet Play/Story

Chapter one

In the beautiful city of Verona, where our story takes place, a long-standing hatred between two families erupts into a new violence, and citizens stain their hands with the blood of their fellow citizens. Two unlucky children of these enemy families become lovers and commit suicide. Their unfortunate deaths put an end to their parents' feud.

*

——SAMPSON and GREGORY, servants of the Capulet Family, are carrying swords and small shields. ——

SAMPSON
Gregory, I swear, we can't let them humiliate us. We won't take their garbage.

GREGORY
(teasing SAMPSON) No, because then we'd be garbage men.

SAMPSON
What I mean is, if they make us angry, we'll pull out our swords.

GREGORY
Maybe if you focus on pulling yourself out of trouble, Sampson.

SAMPSON
I hit hard when I'm angry.

GREGORY
But it's hard to make you angry.

SAMPSON
One of those dogs from the Montague house can make me angry.

GREGORY
Angry enough to run away. You won't stand and fight.

SAMPSON
A dog from that house will make me angry enlighten to TAKE a stand. If I pass one of them on the street, I'll take the side closer to the wall and let him walk in the gutter.

GREGORY
That makes you're the weak one, because weaklings get pushed up against the wall.

SAMPSON
...you're right. That's why girls get pushed up  against walls—they're weak. So what I'll do is push the Montague men into the street and the Montague women up against a wall.

GREGORY
The fight is between our masters, and we men who work for them.

SAMPSON
It's all the same. I'll be a harsh master to them. After I fight the men, I'll be nice to the women—I'll cut off their HEADS.

GREGORY
Cut off their heads? You mean their....maidenheads?

SAMPSON
Cut of their heads, take their maidenheads—whatever. Take my remark in whichever sense you like.

GREGORY
The women you r-pe are the ones who'll have to "sense" it.

SAMPSON
They'll feel me as long as I can keep an erection. Everybody knows I'm a nice piece of flesh.

GREGORY
It's a good thing you're not a piece of fish. You're dried and shucked like a salted fish—

——ABRAM and another servant of the Montague's walk into SAMPSON and GREGORY.——

GREGORY
—Pull out your tool now. These guys are from the house of Montague.

SAMPSON
I have my naked sword out. Fight, I'll back you up.

GREGORY
How will you back me up—by turning your back and running away?

SAMPSON
Don't worry about me.

GREGORY
No, really. I am worried about you!

SAMPSON
Let's not break the law by starting a fight. Let them start something.

GREGORY
I'll frown at them as they pass by, and they can react how ever they want.

SAMPSON
You mean however they dare. I'll bite my thumb at them. That's an insult, and if they let me get away with it they'll be dishonored. (SAMPSON bites his thumb)