Alone

Prologue

Prologue

Tears fell freely from her eyes as she stared at the computer screen in front of her. Eliza's fingers drummed a short beat on her leg as she waited impatiently for her laptop to turn on. Finally, the screen loaded and she typed her password in. The desktop appeared and she clicked on the familiar symbol, opening up Google Chrome. Her homepage was enough to bring a weak smile to her face. Her finger slid across the mouse pad, going to the top right hand side and letting the drop down appear. She clicked on the tab that said My Works. Opening up a new document, her fingers flew across the keyboard as she spilled her emotions out into writing. She knew very well she couldn't talk to anyone because she wasn't good with talking about her feelings. Not even to any of her three-thousand followers on Wattpad. Besides, she didn't even have anyone who would listen to her or who would care.

She titled the page Every Day, Another Day.

"Once you become self-conscious, there is no end to it; once you start to doubt, there is no room for anything else."

How is it possible for the world to be so cruel? It's frightening to know how heartless people could be. I'll admit it: I'm not the best person to be around and I have many faults. But, is it necessary for people to treat me like I'm absolutely worthless?

Out of all people, you'd think my family would at least be my side; you thought wrong. They couldn't care less about me. I'm sorry I'm not good enough for you. You read and hear so many things that say that every girl is beautiful and perfect in her own way. I used to think so too. Not anymore.

Then, there are the people at school. Thank God they don't have my Wattpad! Life would be so much easier if I could just stay in the shadows and have no one even give me a second look. Unfortunately, that's not the case - I can thank my beloved sister for that. She's the most popular girl in the school. She's the head cheerleader, Miss Perfect and Miss Popular. She has the need to spread false rumors about me, and when people hear them, I'm looked down upon. So many times, I've almost made a friend, until she brings up a new rumor and that person ends up leaving me too.

I've gotten used to it by now, I guess. It's nothing new... It's never really gotten physical, but the emotional abuse stings. One out of the many rumors she's spread was during freshman year. I had gotten the flu and was out of school for a week. The day I came back, people gave me the weirdest looks like I was something that they had scraped off the bottom of their shoes. I found out why this was happening in the bathroom between lunch and my fourth block class. It turns out that everyone thought I had an STD - Syphilis. The girls who were talking about me were giggling and calling me unmentionable names... I can clearly remember my heart pounding and my eyes burning from the tears that threatened to spill. My throat suddenly felt dry, and I felt like it was closing up, and I couldn't breathe. Then I heard the voices of the group of girls, not knowing how many there were, fading and the door shutting behind them.

The bell signaling the start of fourth block shrilled loudly. I waited a good five minutes before sneaking out of the bathroom and running out the side door of the school. I vividly remember myself running, running as fast as I could. My Converse clad feet slapped against the hard, concrete ground, my bag hitting my side with every step I took. The one thing I remember perfectly was me sitting on one of the park benches with my knees pulled up to my chest, crying. I remember a boy who looked to be about my age walking down the trail with his hands shoved into his pockets and head down, in deep thought. Hearing my sobs, his head snapped up and he spotted me. The look he gave me was enough to make me want to throw up. He weakly smiled, giving me a look of pity. I despised that look - pity. I hated people feeling sorry for me. So, I was up and running. Without a second look, I ran all the way home. I knew soon my sister would be home and she would just laugh at my misery. I knew she would get a kick out of knowing what happened, and trust me, she'll know by then.

That was the first time I felt so worthless, like absolute trash. I felt alone, with no one to run to, to comfort me. I locked myself in my room and cried. I knew I couldn't give her the satisfaction of knowing she hurt me, so as soon as I heard her open the door downstairs, I cleaned myself up and took out my English homework, acting as if nothing happened. I knew that when mom and dad got home from work she would tell them about me running out of school and skipping class. But, guess what?

I didn't care.

Not one bit.

That was just the first time she hurt me badly. I'm not going into detail about every single time that she was the reason my world began to crumble.

Don't think I'm doing this for attention, because I'm not. I'm doing this so you can learn more about me. You all have supported me so much, and I love all my fans dearly. This is just a little piece of me I'm sharing with you.

I'll talk to you all soon! :)

Love,
lxnelygirl