“I'll be back soon.” That was the last thing he told me before dying. The last thing he told me before we bought a house, before we got wed and had kids. Before we grew old together. And before I got to say my last words to.
People had told me that they were sad for me. And they never failed to remind me how miserable my situation was. Perhaps it was sad. They said things like “I feel so bad for you, you two made such a nice couple.” They said how strong I was, for handling the situation so maturely. And when I looked into their eyes, I saw pity. I saw mourning. But when I looked at mine, I saw nothing. It was vacant and bare. It didn't have any heartache or anguish. I felt strange. I hated this feeling. My stomach was twitching, and my head hurt. But I stayed still. Numbness filled me up from inside.
There weren't a lot of people at the funeral. Only close friends and family. Just like how he wanted it to be. He talked about how he wanted his funeral to be once. With only the people he considered his true friends. So we kept his wish and made it small and quiet.
I went to visit his parents two weeks after the funeral. They lived in a cosy home,with a medium sized yard beside it. Minato likes gardening alot. He sometimes spends his days here, taking care of the flowers and plants. A koi fish pond at the side of the sunflower bed.
I sat beside Kushina, in front of me was Minato. I couldn't face him, not yet. A feeling of shame washed up on me so instead of facing him, I stared at the garden. The sun was starting to set. The evening sky came together hiding the sun behind them, the clouds now looked orange. His favourite colour.
I placed the chamomile tea my father had given me on the table. He told me that it was good for stress relief and insomnia. Or something like that. I wasn't really listening. That time I was staring at the wall in front of me the whole time. There was a picture of me and him hung on it. We took it at our highschool graduation.I remember him hugging me so hard,i could hear his heartbeats.
Kushina placed three cups on the table,smoke coming out from the tea. No one said anything. We just sat there. Only one thing on our minds. A boy named Naruto.
The cup in my hands was getting cold,but I couldn't say anything. What should I say? They had just lost their only son and I lost my lover.I still stared at the garden, a comfortable silence in the room. It was obvious Minato had not taken care of it for the past few days. I could notice the difference from the last time I came here.There were overgrown hedges and weeds were starting to grow. If he was here he would have offered to help and say something like “Old man, you should just call me the next time you need to fix things.”
“So, how are you now? I know its a stupid question but we didn’t talk at the funeral that much. Me and Minato are both still shocked, it's like he is still with us.” Kushina started as she poured herself another glass of the tea. “I am fine” I paused for a sec, “I am fine, yeah.” Was I fine? I didn't know. I was okay, right? “Thank you for the tea, I have had severe headaches since the past few days, I can finally feel it going away.” I didn't say anything, but instead I looked into her eyes, they were red and had dried up tear stains. My heart stopped beating for a second and realisation soon hit me. She had just lost her child, her only child. “I am sorry, I am so sorry.”. The words left my mouth before I could process anything. I felt like i just vomited, my stomach felt empty. My head hung low after saying those words. I want to leave.
