I am sadly in a silly position right now because I cannot remember anything around me and everything seems to be so blurry, I feel scared but I cannot do anything about that, I guess I just have to resist it. My mind felt like shutting down again, but I felt the desperate urge to fight against it, like I needed to do something desperately and I think I was also afraid to disappoint? I have no idea what was going on and why my body was acting like this. I hate this feeling, I felt hopeless, like my whole existence was looking for a little spark of anything, just to lighten this dark path now embedded in my blood. I don't seem to be a newborn baby, fear kept rising in my soon boiling blood, I was soon going insane, this feeling of the unknown driving me closer towards it, speeding up every second or time I took a breath...
