WHISPERS OF A BUTTERFLY • Kamisato Ayato

twelve. 十二

Weddings were not something that made you happy. You were sure of this now.

Beneath the vast swish of skirts, you flexed your feet, glad your sandals had flat soles. If you wore heels, you'd be limping at Chisato's wedding. You dreaded seeing her and you imagined that she dreaded seeing you. Maybe she didn't want you there. It would be awkward to attend the wedding that canceled yours.

But then again, you remembered angrily, that every last thread had been woven in Ayato's favor. It was pathetic to feel disappointed. You didn't like Ayato anyway. He was arrogant, tactless, and thought he had the right to disappoint you. Pride overwhelmed your desire to prove that he did not.

And there was the fact that you were to be ushered into the role of the Kanjou Commission's head, even though you were perfectly comfortable in your position as the spare. In another life, you would have loved the position, and the absolute power it would grant you. But after seeing just how cruel and scripted everything you had to do for Inazuma was, the thought of sacrificing more only made you miserable.

You didn't want much to do with the Kanjou Commission anymore. You wanted peace. You would never, ever voice the thought aloud, but that peace had only ever come to you in the Yashiro Commission.

You had thought being beside Ayato all the time would make you uncomfortable, snippy, and disagreeable. Instead he only ever made you feel like you could truly be yourself.

"Are you lost, miss?"

Quizzical children wearing straw hats and rumpled clothes had called to you, pausing their game of temari.

"Ritou is that way," one kid pointed out. "If you walk back where you started, you'll be in Inazuma City."

"I believe I'm at the correct place," Your posh, prim manner of speaking differentiated you from their country accents. "Konda Village is my destination."

They looked taken aback, but they must have realized that you were there for the wedding so they pointed you on your way. You stuck out like a sore thumb. You were dressed for brunch with the Shogun in Tenshukaku, pretty fabrics hanging from your waist, while the villagers wore humbled, washed-out summer robes.

A familiar face with black hair waved. "Lady F/N!"

"Arataki Itto," you greeted the oni politely. "It has been a long time."

"You lookin' for Ayato?"

"I wish." You didn't realize what you said until the words left your mouth.

Before you could take it back, Itto grinned at you. "He'll be around soon enough."

You were not looking forward to that, not after your last confrontation with him.

"Want you... want you... all you've ever done is make me want you."

His words played in your head again and again like a broken record.

Konda Village was nowhere near as glamorous as Tenshukaku. Fat koi fish languidly swam in crystal clear gutters that wove through the lawns. Dust clouded under your slippers from the road. Every now and then, a chicken would run past, bobbing its head wildly as irritated men chased after it.

Something hurt in your chest.

Memories had a funny way of comforting you and slicing you raw. You could vividly recall how you'd play with Ayato in Konda Village on crisp sakura springtimes like this, how he'd walk with you with a sword at his hip to protect you from ronins, how you'd both laugh and shake every time you made contact with water after touching electro; the sun on your skin, the stars winking at you, when you'd silently wish for Ayato to want you in those days. For him to like you. Desire you. Love you.