He's A Girl Now?! (TD Transfem Duncan AU) (ON HOLD 1/14/24)

Four - Come Out

"I can't."

Sabrina whispered to herself, shivering in her seat.

She couldn't step onto the plane. She couldn't be on that stupid show. She couldn't show herself to the world like she did when "he" was seventeen. Oh, no, no no no. She never could.

Her hands were shaking. Like, literally shaking. She imagined every individual eye that would witness her make a fool of herself on live TV. Brown ones. Green ones. Blue ones, belonging to the people she got her own eyes from. All those eyes. All on her. Her, The Delinquent. Her, the boy who thought he was a girl. 

He! He! He!

HE! HIM! BOY! MAN! FUCK-

"Hey, who are you?"

Geoff looked up at her with a tilted head. He was wearing this pink t-shirt and a beanie with jean shorts. He looked so similar to what Sabrina remembered. And she knew that Geoff was a trans ally. Okay... maybe it'll be alright.

"Oh. Uh- I'm Sabrina..."

Her words strolled away from her mouth. 

Geoff's eyebrows furrowed. "I didn't know we had new contestants. Chris said it was just OG's. But nice to meet you." He smiled and held out a hand. She took it. 

"Oh, no." Sabrina shook her head, taking a huge risk. "I-I'm not new."

"Oh?" Geoff said, intrigued.

"U-Uh... well, I... you already know me. I was in the first season."

"How come I've never seen you?"

"You have. I'm just... different now."

"What do you mean by that?"

Sabrina thought for a moment. "Well, I'm not so much of a jerk anymore. I'd like to think I'm nicer. And... well..."

She pulled out a trans pin from her jacket pocket. She had thought of wearing it, but she really didn't want the stares. She'd have to tell everyone anyway. Eventually. But she'll cross that bridge when she comes to it.

Geoff blinked, then smiled. "Oh, sick! Well, who were you before?"

Sabrina swallowed. This was the hard part. But luckily, before she could respond, a look of realization washed over Geoff's face. He must've noticed that Duncan wasn't here and Sabrina was.

She just looked away, unable to speak.

Geoff's only question was, "Can I still call you dude? I call everyone dude."

She laughed. Unexpectedly, she laughed. Because god, it was so Geoff to realize that one of his super hypermasculine friends who'd been missing for two years was a woman now and his only question being about nicknames.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm cool with that." She smiled weakly.

"Cool," Geoff said casually, flashing her a smile and a rock-out hand signal.

***

The contestants had just gotten on the boat, which just looked run-down and sad by this point in its life. Sabrina's leg involuntarily bounced. In fewer than ten minutes, she'd need to exit the boat.

Breathe, she insisted to herself. You're trans, not a serial killer. Everyone else is just as nervous as you are.

But being trans sure felt like being a serial killer sometimes, judging by all the shit she'd seen online about trans girls lately. Most thought they were crazy child predators. Some thought they were all just weird gay dudes playing dress up (she didn't even like guys, she was a lesbian, thank you not so much). It was a good year to be trans in relation to older days, but was there ever really a good time to be trans?

Geoff was seated next to her, along with DJ and Bridgette, both very understanding about the whole "Duncan isn't Duncan anymore" thing. Bridgette was just surprised that Duncan wasn't such a prick now.

"What are you guys majoring in?" Bridgette asked. DJ was in some elite cooking school (congrats!). Geoff wasn't going to college (expected).

"I'm studying criminology. I wanna be a private investigator."

"But don't you have a criminal record? Weren't you, like, anti-cop?" Bridgette asked her.

"Ironic, isn't it?"

(authors note: tysm for 132 reads!!!! ik this is a bit of a shorter chapter since i've kinda been losing inspo but i'm not quitting 100%. also just forget that the whole arson cottage mansion thing happened okay sabrina didn't go to jail actually)