Cold as Ice: The Heart of Stone

Chapter 16 - Watching & Waiting

I don't know what day I'm on being stuck in this state of limbo with no clue how to wake myself
up but I think it's day 3 nearly 4? I've learnt that if I don't get to worked up in whatever world this is my body stays calm and I don't get a big needle injection that puts me to in a double sleep.

I've spend most of my time watching Leah watch me. She looks cute as always, but she looks absolutely done in. I don't know if she has slept for more than a couple hour in the last couple of days because as quickly as she falls asleep she seems to wake up in distress, almost like I'll be gone. I can't help the guilt feeling that creeps up on me every now and again because she will not budge to home.

I also am mad, she's not been training which will mean she misses the game in a couple of days.

Her mum stayed with her most of today, which for me is a big surprise because I know she isn't a fan of me because of what I did but I guess she needs to be there for her daughter.

"Leah darling, go home, have a shower and try and get some sleep."

Yes! please!

"I'm not leaving her mum. I won't leave her alone! She doesn't like hospitals."

No!

I watch on as the battle continues. Eventually she agrees to got home with Beth collecting her, she's gonna shower as long as Amanda stays by my side but will not budge on the sleep. I wish she would just get in the bed with me so I can feel her close.

As Leah leaves with Beth she turns back and looks at me. I, in dickhead fashion wave her off like she can see me.

"Oh Rori, what are we going to do with you." I turn around and see Amanda rubbing her head with a sigh.

"I'm sorry!" I shout, "I'm so sorry!"

"You know I should hate you right?" She looks at my body taking my hand. Of course I know she should hate me, she has every right.

"Why have you gotta be such a loveable character aye?"

I can feel I want to cry, but nothing comes out. I know I hurt Leah, but I didn't realise the hurt I could have caused Amanda. That's the thing with me I don't think, especially when I'm high on painkillers apparently.

"If there is a possibility you can hear me... I would loveee a some sort of vintage dom perignon, I guess I can call it even after that." She jokes which makes me laugh, it makes me laugh more that she is laughing at herself.

I guess we are all alittle crazy right? Amanda is talking to me even though in her head I'm asleep and can't hear her, Leah watches me so intently her eyes could burst, and I'm in some sort of different reality. Yeah, everyone is alittle crazy.

She soon pulls out a book and begins to read it to me. I feel like a little child again, it's nice. I sit on the floor listening just taking it all in.

—

When Leah came back she fell asleep really quickly. I just watched, thats all I can do but it's comforting having her close again. Eventually the door opens again and and all the girls come stumbling in which makes me laugh. Leah must have been exhausted because she didn't even stir as she's lay across Amanda.

"How's she doing?" Beth asks sheepishly.

"The same." Amanda smiles towards the big group who look rather deflated at her words.

"Do you reckon she would be mad if I drew all over her face?"

I spin my head and see McCabe with a sharpie. I will kill her.

The girls laugh, "Katie you can't do that."

"I'm sure she won't mind." She shrugs nonchalantly making her way over to my face.

I will bloody mind!

Steph grabs the pen and shoved it in her pocket. "Enough of that thankyou McCabe." She scowls

Thank god for people like Steph.

—

Leah wakes up after a few of hours. I'm glad she's been able to get some sleep, she really needed it. I've just been listening sat amongst the girls who have been talking some absolute rubbish, I'm surprised Amanda joined in adding her own stories here and there. Wait till I tell Katie I heard her admit she fancied me I first joined Arsenal.

The girls soon all leave just leaving me Leah and Amanda once again.

"I'm gonna go now sweetheart, call me if anything changes. I'll be back in the morning." She kisses her head before making her way over to me and kissing my head.

I see a small smile creep onto Leah's face. "See you tomorrow mum."

Leah stretches her legs out pacing around the room before suddenly stopping at the end of the bed, she leans on the handles taking a deep breath.

"Fuck it." She say grabbing her phone with a pair of air pods.

She climbs onto the bed and makes her way up to me. I can't help but watch on with a smile. I feel her body press her up against me while putting a pod in one of my ear and placing one on hers. She scrolls aimlessly through her phone trying to close a playlist.

"That one." I say out loud hoping she will choose it. "Actually no, that one." She scrolls past before stopping and scrolling back up. She hovers her finger over the play button and I can't help my heart flutters. The heart rate monitor goes up slightly as Leah lifts her head towards it then faces me.

"That one yeah?" She smiles and I watch as she places a gently kiss on my forehead before laying back down next to my body. This is why I need to come back, moments like this. Whatever the future holds, its moment like this that make me think life is indeed worth living.

I crawl up the bed in a similar fashion to Leah and lay back on my own body and feel my eyes begin to slowly shut, suddenly I'm really tired. I turn and see Leah's eyes are doing the same.

"Sleep well Le." I whisper, hoping in one world or another she will be able to hear me.