Sweet Girl

It's funny that you understood

"Okay, little miss Bella" Stevie soothed, rubbing slow circles on the little girl's back, as she carried her back to the car.
"I know, I know" she hushed as the little girl cried.
"Stevie's sorry. I know, it was too much."
She shushed as she held Bella's head to her shoulder, hoping the crying would dissolve once they got back in the car.

"Okay," she whispered, nodding to the driver as he held the back seat door open.
She slithered in, clutching Bella against her chest, who's cries were quickly descending to wails.
She lowered Bella into her seat, erupting a loud scream as she untangled her from her embrace.
"Shhh" Stevie soothed, to no avail, trying to buckle her in quickly, so she could hurl a shawl over her as they rushed home.

Bella desperately clawed at Stevie's hands, trying to change her mind and let her sit on her lap. Her lungs swelled, her throat started to sting from her cries. The only possibility, as she saw it, was that Stevie was hurting her.
She lunged her legs forward, feeling the ends of her shoes clomp against Stevie's shins.
"Hey!" Stevie shouted, instinctively, shocking the little girl.
"We don't kick. Or hit-" she added, managing to swerve from a tiny hand swatting her.

Bella thrust herself upward, trying to escape, a tornado of fear and rage tearing through her rational thinking. Not understanding why she was being held down, feeling suffocated by the pressure on her chest, she croaked a scream from her folding lungs.

"Bella. Bella, look at Stevie", a panicked voice emerged.
She looked up, finding Stevie's torn expression, her heart immediately circulating guilt through her little body.
"Let's stop these tears, now." Stevie said gently, trying to conceal the tremble in her voice.
Bella copied Stevie's over-exaggerated exhale, soothing herself with Stevie's smooth nodding and rhythmic tapping on her right knee.

"There's a good girl." Stevie whispered, managing a smile through her anxiety over what had just unfolded.
"Look,"
Bella reached her arms outward as Bambi poked his head round her headrest, soon finding him on her lap.
Stevie hushed as she threw her shawl over Bella and shakily gave her her pacifier. Her leg stung with the residing feeling of Bella's kick as she sat down.
"Okay, little miss, all better?" She said, trying to turn the dial up on the whimsy in her voice. She leant forward and stroked Bella's left cheek, in an effort to remind her that she understood.
Contrarily, as she sat back, she worried that this situation she'd created was more than raising a toddler.
She noticed a fear brewing inside her, the anxiety kettle whistling through her ears, that she was out of her depth.