The Emperor

15

CHAOS

       Dawn and I always have had this thing going on. Ever since our fathers became close friends, I was introduced to the neighbor's daughter. We were supposed to be great friends, best friends, perhaps more than that.

       But Dawn is everything that I am not, even then.

       I was a quiet boy, she was the loudest girl in town. I enjoyed preying on animals, she enjoyed petting them. I hated bright colors, she only wore clothes that would burn my eyes.

       We weren't made to be friends. She might be the most lovable person to some people, but I have never wished death upon anyone more than her since my mother.

       It isn't just because of my angel, the one I would give anything to keep by my side, no. Dawn has been pushing my buttons, one by one, loving the way I snap, the way I hurt, the way I kill. While the latest is forbidden to me, only when it concerns her though, by some stupid rule Alexander made up; we all three have a free pass. A person off limits. I picked Adeline, of course. Alexander chose Dawn and Azrel hasn't made up his mind yet, even if I do doubt he'll ever be able to think highly enough of someone to choose them.

       If killing Dawn has been prohibited, I did find myself liking toying her around a bit, just poking at the open wounds. I anger her as much as she angers me, if not more.

       The thing is, Dawn has limits that I don't.
       That, she never understands. She never did. Not when I left her for the raccoons in the forest to die until Alexander found her and brought her back.

       Not when I pushed her down the stairs of our mansion hoping she would break her neck while falling.

       Not when I slammed the door of our class on her hand hard enough to break it.

       I've always known she is a masochist but I'm not the one she fucks, why would she keep insisting on me hurting her? It doesn't make sense, not even to me.

       I don't believe she wants to protect Adeline from me. I think she's jealous that someone else is here to be my own personal souffre-douleur. I do not wish to hurt my Adeline though, not right now at least. She and I still have so much more to go through before I can allow myself to let go of my restraints.

       Dawn and I are past that stage, there is no limit with her. I can do whatever I want. As long as my brother is nowhere near.

       I had a fight last night, it solved a few urges, then Adeline brought all of them back, then she calmed them by sleeping in my bed, her body glued to mine, then Dawn had to trigger me for the umpteenth time.

        Dawn always ruins it. Every single time. She ruins all of my plans. She ruins everything. I regretted giving up on my goal the second I agreed to cancel.

       Dawn is a nuisance.
       I skin the nuisances out of their flesh.

       "Kaiser?" Adeline's whisper sounds far away from where I am, even if she is standing just a few steps from me. I can't hear her. It doesn't reach the right part of my mind, the one telling me perhaps I'm taking things too far. I could stop, if I put enough will into it. I could but Dawn fucking Lockwood dares to grin at me, she's taunting me. She wants me to keep going, who am I to deny her wishes?