in the middle of the chaos | jean kirstein x fem!reader

13 | in the middle of the graduation

''Offer your lives!''

All 218 cadets moved in sync, saluting. ''Yes, sir!''

''From this day forth, all of you who have graduated from being trainees have three options. Firstly, the Garrison, which is responsible for wall fortification and defending the towns. Secondly, the Survey Corps—'' Y/n felt like Eren was about to burst from excitement next to her. ''—which resolutely ventures outside the wall into titan territory. And lastly, the Military Police Brigade, which governs the cities and maintains order.'' This time, Y/n felt like she was about to explode. ''Of course, only those that we previously announced to be ranked amongst the top ten trainees can select the third option!''

Y/n straightened even further if possible, proudly standing between Eren and Jean — sixth place wasn't bad, definitely better than seventh. She'd managed to score higher than Jean and he was never going to hear the end of it. Despite that, he seemed more mad that he'd scored lower than Eren rather than Y/n.

Y/n looked to the rest of the lower five — Jean, Marco, Connie and Sasha all made it to the top ten, meaning their dream of all going to the MPs would actually come true.

———

Y/n happily sipped on her drink as she sat next to a brooding Jean — it was their 'graduation party' in Trost and everyone was excitedly talking with their fellow cadets; some people would most likely never see each other again. It felt weird to think about it. She was most likely never going to see Eren, Armin and Mikasa again, especially considering . . .

She shook her head. No. Those three were strong. They'll survive anything that comes their way and Y/n was sure they would meet again someday.

''Why was I ranked below Eren?'' Jean's voice was low, but Y/n heard him anyway.

She hummed. ''You were ranked below me, too, you know.''

Jean's head snapped to her. ''Yeah, but you're actually skilled. Jeager, on the other hand . . .''

''I think your ego is making you underestimate him, Jean-Bo,'' Y/n booped his nose as a joke, though Jean's eyes widened. ''Besides, it doesn't matter. He's going to the Survey Corps, we're going to the MPs. You won't have to deal with him for a long time.''

Jean sighed. ''I guess so . . . still! Damn it!'' Jean raised his cup and took a few large gulps. Y/n laughed as he almost choked on his drink.

''You can't win!''

The room fell into silence. Y/n and Jean, as well as the rest of the 104th Cadet Corps, all looked at where Eren and Thomas stood — Thomas's eyes were wide as he yelled at Eren. He seemed to calm down as he noticed all eyes were on them. ''You know too, right?'' Thomas asked. ''About the tens of thousands of victims. The answer was obvious after over twenty percent of the population was lost. Mankind can't win against the titans.''

A pit formed in Y/n's stomach. She looked at her half-empty cup. She agreed with Thomas. Eren, Mikasa and Armin wanted to throw away their lives for humanity, but would it really pay off? Did her father's death pay off? She put a hand over her vest's pocket, where her small family portrait was.

''So . . . Are you giving up because you think you can't win?'' Eren asked. ''True, up until now, it's been a loosing battle for mankind. But that's because we didn't know much about the titans! A battle of recourses against the titans is pointless. Although we lost, the information we obtained through fighting will surely bring hope!''

Y/n stood up, pushing her drink to Jean. ''You can finish this.''

His head snapped away from Eren, his glare turning soft. ''Are you—''