Dead roses. Mendable heart.

Chapter 4- "Stupid memories"

Y/N's POV

Why did Shuji have to show up at my house yesterday? Just out of the blue? I wanted to forget about him but he keeps showing up in everything the last couple days. Then he shows up to my fucking house?

I wish I could go back in time to when I never met him, so I wouldn't feel so hurt, so betrayed. Why'd he replace me like that? With his "friend". He was so worried about Kisaki he lost all eyes for me. What I get for falling for a gang member am I right?

Not like I wasn't a gang member at one point but that's long gone. I just did some stuff here and there. Not like I was much of an importance.

I can't help it anymore. I'm still not over him after all these months of trying. I have to admit to it.

I miss his tall stature, slim body, long arms that would wrap around me when he'd hug me. His hands, holding mine and I felt nothing but comfort. I didn't feel alone.

I have Aurora yea, but, I wish I had someone to talk to everyday again. Just like old times.

I would never let anyone know this though, of course not. I couldn't risk making my life even worse by trying to get him back into it. I'm already heart broken enough.

For a long time I had plans of marrying him, having kids, growing old. But the people around you change you, you have to choose the right people, before the wrong people choose you.

More than anything I wish I could get this stupid memories out of my head of everything we've ever done together. If I could forget that maybe I wouldn't have gained this pain back.

See, not only have I not gotten rid of all the things he left, but I also haven't got rid of everything he ever gave me. It just was too much for me to get rid of.

We spent everyday together and I feel like it was my fault. My fault because I told him to stop fighting. He's in a gang, what else was he gonna do? He's already well known as a gang member. No one would let him get a job, no one would be his friend other than gang members.

I was one of the only other people he had, and I pushed him away because I didn't want him to get hurt. Now, he's not even mine. He's doing god knows what.
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~Flashback to yesterday~
3rd person POV

Y/N wakes up to her dog barking and knocking at the door. Again.

She stomps to the door because she's irritated someone woke her from her nap,  "What happened now Takash-"

"Hello Y/N, been a few months hasn't it?"

"Shuji."

"Y/n, I need to talk to you."

"Not happening," She looks into his eyes, "not after you chose a gang over your own girlfriend."

"Let me come in, it's cold."

"Just for a few minutes," she said while closing the door, "what the hell do you want."

"I wanted to apologize for what I did. I left you for the gang because you were so worried about me getting hurt. I never had someone who cared for me that much, I was scared to lose you but I lost you either way. I lo-"

"Hanma. Don't you dare say it. I'm glad you're sorry but it hurt when you left. You left me because I was concerned about your well-being, yet, I still have cared about how you are. I still have all the stuff you left if you want it back."

"Can you listen to me. I fight my everyday for you. I haven't given up because I believe, one day, you'll let me come back to you. I know it won't be for a while. But for the love of god. I love you more than I realized a few months ago. My friends keep trying to get me with other girls, no one can replace you."

"Your time is up, Hanma."

"Y/n please, give me a chance."

"I'm sorry Hanma, you have to go."

"I love you."

Y/N then slams the door. "I love you too, Hanma. Why are you so hard to forget." She whispers.

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