Michael Corner and The Education of Wizards

Michael Corner and The Lost Galleon

'I totally get what you mean about the structure of the course, Professor' said Terry Boot, in his best I-will-keep-up-this-reasonable-but-persistent-approach-until you-give-me-what-I want-just-to-shut-me-up tone of voice 'Although the teacher who was teaching about dark creatures demonstrated some of them as and when he happened to find them.'

'But he was a dark creature himself,' said Professor Umbridge. 'He knew where they were.'

'He was a werewolf,' Terry agreed, 'but he taught us about werewolves without turning himself. What I was hoping you could tell us is how we could cope if we did encounter a Dark wizard, or witch.'

'There are no Dark wizards,' said Professor Umbridge.

'I mean, I totally accept that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named isn't alive,' he said. 'But what about someone like Sirius Black?'

'Who has said anything about Black?' she said sharply.

'The Ministry,' said Terry.

'The Ministry hasn't said anything about Black,' she said.

'That's my point, really,' said Terry. 'A couple of years ago it was all about Sirius Black. We were all warned about him and we had those Dementors around the castle. Nothing's been said recently about him and the Ministry hasn't announced that they've caught him, so presumably he's still out there.'

'Yes, he may be still out there,' she said. 'Which means that he is not in here, so you don't need to worry about him.'

'He did break in,' I murmured, and immediately wished I hadn't.

'Hand, Mr Corner,' she said.

I put my hand up and she ignored me.

'You need have no concerns about Dark wizards, or Black ones.' She tittered winsomely, which made my teeth ache. 'Besides, in the very remote possibility that you do encounter something, you already have the knowledge at your disposal to deal with it, as you demonstrated last year, I believe, Mr Corner.'

'I'm sorry, Professor,' I said, thoroughly confused. 'What are you talking about?'

The whole class held its breath. We knew she had already taken Potter down, and she came with a bit of a reputation. Mandy Brocklehurst had written to her auntie, who worked in the Ministry, to ask what she was like. Auntie Maude had replied to the effect that Umbridge was not the brightest, but cunning and vindictive, and universally loathed. Auntie Maude had been inexplicably sacked, which proved:

a) That she was correct

b) That our mail was being opened.

'I am talking about you encounter with the monster in the Lake when it attacked one of our visitors,' she said sweetly. 'You dealt with it perfectly well using spells you already knew, didn't you?'

'She wasn't attacking,' I said. 'It was just the Squid. She wanted to join in.'

'It is still a monster,' she said.

'Yes ma'am,' I said, retreating into obscurity.

'Well, I hope they're going to adjust the exam to reflect the fact that we haven't been taught anything,' said Terry as we walked down to Potions, where it would at least be nice and cool. Umbridge's classroom was very small and obviously intended to be cosy, but it was too small for us and The Huffs together. It had been like a rather manky oven by the end of the lesson.

Terry didn't mention exams again, but the subject was clearly on his mind because he put his hand up during the very next lesson.

'Excuse me, Professor. Could I ask something about the exam prep?' he said.