Heart in Range

Episode V - Out of breath

I woke up late for class, Andy seemed to already have been gone...
I grabbed my bag and ran as fast as I could to my poetry class, I was about 20 minutes late- So I got in class as everyone looked at me weirdly except Andy, he was daydreaming whilst looking out the window like he always does, not giving a single shit about this class.

Teacher: "And so, has anyone even started on their papers yet? Anyone at all?"

Two girls raised their hands and giggled, the teacher looked pretty upset to see that almost nobody even thought of starting, even though it's just the second day...

Hours after hours, all I heard was lectures and complicated explanations... The next bell rang, and I had to go to my swimming class, which is a problem because... I can't swim, at all.

So instead, i was the person who cleaned up after everyone finished swimming, it was an indoor pool and it was really fucking hot. The water was so nice, it was a really big pool. I bet you could fit a whale in there, it was pretty deep from what I saw...

As an hour quickly passed by, everyone left the pool area and so I was alone, cleaning...
Tidying up props and sweeping floors, I felt like a janitor...

As I was cleaning, I didn't come to notice that there was someone behind me, he smiled and walked closer to me- yet I never heard any footsteps coming towards me...
He got closer, and closer... Close enough to whisper in my ear-

Andy: "Boo."

I got startled as I quickly looked back I slipped and fell into the pool, my arms reaching out to him, my eyes were opening widely and hit the water. I just kept sinking, it felt like slowly falling... The silence around me, slowly drowning...

Andy: "Tyler, you can come out now, come on I said I'm sorry"

I was still there, in the water... Sinking deeper as my hands were trying to reach out for the sky, all my air was gone, It felt right... It felt like I was gonna... Drown...

Andy: "Tyler! Come on!! GET OUT OF THERE!"

As he panicked, he took his shirt of and dived into the pool, swimming as past as he could to save me, he grabbed me and held me in his arms. Holding me close to him- as if his life depended on it... Or mine...

As we got out, he put me down on the floor next to the steps of the pool and tried to push out all the water from my lungs, giving me mouth to mouth... Gasping for air, the drops from his hair fell onto my face as he closed his eyes and looked down...

Andy: "I'm... I'm so sorry..."

Eventually I started to cough out water, trying to breathe...

Andy: "Oh my god, you're alive!"

Me: "Wh-What the hell... Happened?"

Andy: "I thought you'd drown... I thought it was over"

Me: "You idiot"

Andy: "Shut up, shortie. I got worried..."

Andy helped me up as he carried his shirt on his wet shoulder, it was the last class of the day luckily, so we got to go to our dorms and get dry...

Andy threw me one of his sweaters I could keep to not catch a cold- And so, he went to take a shower... I couldn't help but smell the sweater, it smelled like him... I feel safe in this sweater already, I was pretty happy.

As Andy got back, he put on his home clothes and sat on his bed pulling out his laptop.

Andy: "How about we watch that anime?"

Me: "sure, sounds fun..."

Andy: "Well yeah, I almost got you killed..."

We sat on his bed and watched Attack on Titan on his laptop, the fairy lights were on, the blinds were down- It was pretty cozy, we started watching the first episode, then the second one...

Episode after episode, for about an hour and a half...

Andy: "Hey, how about we take a break and head out?"

Me: "Where to?"

Andy: "The courtyard maybe?"

Me: "Sure, I'll bring my guitar"

And so, after watching anime next to each other, we headed out...
I was still wearing his sweater as it got cold, we sat on an old bench surrounded by Sakura trees.
I played a song on my guitar, as Andy sang along to the melody...

In the end, Joe and Adam came along and sat with us, we all laughed and talked... When I turned to my left I saw a girl with a black streak in her hair, she looked familiar...
And so she turned around and saw us, then walked over to our bench.

Bella: "Oh Hey guys! Didn't know you were here..."

Andy: "Bella? ..."

Bella: "Yeah what?"

Me: "You look... You look different without your uniform on... A lot different"

Bella: "Well yeah, I'm punk rock as hell yo"

Andy: "Hey, that's my line!"

Bella: "Oops, it's mine now" - She smiles sarcastically

We all say down, and so Andy smoked another cigarette (of course)...
Bella stared at me all confused, and looked at Andy too- As if she was thinking?
She looked a lot different than the first time I saw her, she looks more like a rebel, light brownish hair, a black highlight on her side, black leather boots and band clothes...

Bella: "Are you two like... Dating or something?"

Andy: "What? No?" - He stuttered while he exhaled his smoke.

Bella: "well you should, you could would look cute together"

Andy: "We're just roommates, nothing more."

Something inside me didn't feel right... It just hurt as he said it.
But... Why did I care so much of what he said? It's not like... I love him.

But just the way he said it... It just hit me, that's when I felt like I did want to drown in that pool...
I felt like I was about to cry... But I help my head up, and ignored it all.

Joe: "I think it might rain again today, Adam. Let's go back inside?"

Adam: "You too, Bella?"

Andy: "Yeah, we'll go too. Let's go, Tyler"

Me: "You- You go ahead, I'll stay here..."

As I saw everyone leaving, I stayed under the tree on my own, sitting on this bench...
In my heart I wanted Andy to come after me, I saw him walk away from me. Nothing hurt as much as this did. But I didn't want to be hurt by a guy! I have to fight my feelings, I can't possibly... Love him...

A girl suddenly ran up to Andy and hugged him as he hugged back and smiled. My eyes were shocked, as I felt my heart break into a thousand pieces, maybe he's right... Maybe we are just... Roommates...

Then, why do I feel so jealous? Could that be his... Girlfr- no... I'm torturing myself like this,
I never saw him smile like this, I should just give this up... He's a guy, I have no chance...

We'd never be... As one...
Oh, Andy... Why can't you see my tears right now? Is it because of the rain?
I promised I'd stay with you even without rain but this... I can't do this anymore...

Forgive me...