'behind every favourite song there's an untold story'
"Mujhse ye sab mat hi karaiye." I told my father who was talking about my marriage.
(Don't make me do all this)"Meri bacchi, ye ladka acha hai tere liye. Sar ankho par rakhega tujhe." I looked at him with amused look.
(My child, this boy is good for you. He will keep you by all means, with pleasure)Who wouldn't when your dad was the one who left your mom? No hate to him but he hasn't been the men a women would want. Atleast not Two years back.
"Ye aap khe rahe? Ye chiz mere samne bolne se phele das baar soch liya karein aap papa. Yaad hai na aap hi the mummy ko iss ghar se nikalne wale?" I said and looked at him with rage. Controlling myself from saying anything further. Afterall he is my father.
(You are saying this? Please think 10 times before you say this in front of me dad. You do remember that you were the one who removed my mom from this house?)I sighed when I saw him getting sad. I stood up and went out to get some fresh air. I don't want marry now and everyone knows very well what's the reason, yet, for the tenth time I've got a marriage proposal.
I sat on the grass as I was in the garden. I took out my phone and played "Agar tum saath ho" by Arijit Singh. It is one of my favourite song. After my parents separated, this was the song that helped me in a manner which no one could.
It's lines are heart touching and no matter how good other songs are this one will always be on top.
After the song finished, I dialled my mom's number. After few rings the call was answered.
"Kesi hai meri bachi?" I smiled hearing her.
(How is my child?)"Achi hu aap kese ho?" I said, trying to cover up my sadness.
(I'm fine, how are you?)"Aise kyu bol rahi hai? Kuch hua hai kya?" And here we go, ofc we can't hide things from our mom, can we?
(Why are you talking like this? Something happened?)Even if we do they'll find out about it and wait for you to tell them about it.
"Firse shaadi wali baat kar rahe hai papa." I said while whining.
(Dad is talking about marriage again)She chuckled and replied, "Toh? Isme mu phooga ne wali konsi baat hai?"
(So? What's there to be sad about?)"Mujhe nhi karni koi shaadi waadi. Aap ko bhi pata hai na ye chiz aur unhe bhi. Fir bhi yehi chiz baar baar dhorate hai." I said while doing hand gestures as if she could see.
(I don't want to get married. You know that and he knows it too. Yet he repeats it again and again)"Acha beta tu hi soch, tujhe family start nahi karni? Aur mein? Mujhe nani nhi banana kya?" I face palmed myself and shook my head. Even after 2 years, she is still taking my dad's side.
(Ok dear just thinking, don't you want to start a family? And me? Don't you want to make me grandmother?)"Maa please, aap iss baar toh papa ka saath mat do?" My words come out more like a question.
(Mom please, atleast this time don't support dad?)"Toh aur kis ka saath dungi? Bhale hi baat chit nahi hai humari, pati toh abhi bhi hai na wo mere." She replied. I mean yes he is her husband but don't she feel hatred or something?
(Who else should I support then? Though we don't talk, he is still my husband)Like I'm happy to know that she is supporting him even after whatever happened and that she doesn't feel any hatred but it's sometimes hard to digest the fact she does alot for him.
I know, I know, I might be looking like a bad daughter who doesn't likes her dad. But that's not the case, I'm just not used to all this anymore. I don't know why I hate that people show affection to eachother.
After 40 years of their marriage they seperated their ways. Though they haven't had their divorce but they are looking for a lawyer so that they can do so. And I don't want this to happen.
Both have them are very important to me. If being sold gets them back together like how they were, I would be ready to do so. Though love is something I don't believe in anymore, I still have that feeling somewhere in me for my parents.
I'm just too irritated by the word love. Because of all this I can't even thing anyone in this time can even like eachother seriously. Like, if 40 years of 'love' can be gone and the partners decide to leave eachother just for stupid arguments then what the hell is love?
My thoughts were interrupted when mom said, "dekh beta, bhale hi do log alag ho jaye, ladai ho, ya kuch bhi ho, iska matlab ye nahi hai ke wo dono ek dusre se pyaar nhi karte. Wo mahol ne unhe ye sab karne pe majboor kiya hoga." I frowned and blinked hearing this.
(Look child, even if two people separate, fight, or anything, that doesn't mean that they don't love eachother. That environment must have forced them to do all this)"Iska matlab kya hai? Ki aap dono ek dusre se pyaar karte ho par aana nhi chahte ek dusre ke paas?" I asked
(What does that mean? That you both love eachother but don't want to come to eachother?)I heard my mom sigh, "Jane de, tu abhi nhi samjh payegi mein kya bol rahi hu. Jis din tujhe pyaar hoga uss din yaad aayegi ye baat." I mean I actually didn't understand what she meant.
(Let it be, you won't understand what I'm saying. The day you fall in love, you will remember this)"Mujhe pyaar vyaar nahi hoga, ye sab srif bolne ke liye hai." She chuckled.
(I will not love, this is all for the sake of speaking)" Thik hai humari gudiya, aapko bilkul pyaar nhi hoga." She said, and the sarcasm couldn't be ignored.
(Ok my doll, you won't love at all)We chatted a little and I felt at ease. I went inside the house just to see my brother and SIL hugging eachother which I interrupted.
They awkwardly smiled and I pressed my lips trying not to make cringey face.
Khud toh kuch karti nahi aur na dusro ko karne deti hai.
(you don't do anything neither you let others do something)•
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To be continued.
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The Arrangement
عاطفيةShivani Sharma A girl who was raised up by parents who argue all the time until one day they decided to get divorce, completely ignoring that they had a daughter. Living with a parent is always hard, especially when you love them equally and can't l...